Some parrot!!!

[JJ Irani]

A guy is browsing in a pet shop and sees a parrot sitting on a little
perch. It doesn't have any feet or legs. The guy says aloud, "Jeesh, I
wonder what happened to this parrot?"
>
The parrot says, "I was born this way. I'm a defective parrot."
>
"Holy crap," the guy replies. "You actually understood and answered me!"
>
"I got every word," says the parrot. "I happen to be a highly intelligent
thoroughly educated bird."
>
"Oh yeah?" the guy asks, "Then answer this -- how do you hang onto your
perch without any feet?"
>
"Well," the parrot says, "this is very embarrassing but since you asked,
I wrap my weenie around this wooden bar like a little hook. You can't see
it because of my feathers."
>
"Wow," says the guy. "You really can understand and speak English can't
you?"
>
"Actually, I speak both Spanish and English, and I can converse with
reasonable competence on almost any topic: politics, religion, sports,
physics, philosophy. I'm especially good at ornithology. You really ought
to buy me. I'd be a great companion."
>
The guy looks at the $200.00 price tag. "Sorry, but I just can't afford
that."
>
"Pssssssst," says the parrot, "I'm defective, so the truth is, nobody
wants me cause I don't have any feet. You can probably get me for $20;
just make the guy an offer!"
>
The guy offers $20 and walks out with the parrot.
>
Weeks go by. The parrot is sensational. He has a great sense of
humor,he's interesting, he's a great pal, he understands everything, he
sympathizes, and he's insightful. The guy is delighted.
>
One day the guy comes home from work and the parrot goes,
"Psssssssssssst," and motions him over with one wing. "I don't know if I
should tell you this or not, but it's about your wife and the postman."
>
"What are you talking about?" asks the guy.
>
"When the postman delivered the mail today, your wife greeted him at the
door in a sheer black nightie."
>
"WHAT???" the guy asks incredulously. "THEN what happened?"
>
"Well, then the postman came into the house and lifted up her nightie and
began petting her all over," reported the parrot.
>
>NO!" he exclaims. "And she let him?"
>
"Yes. Then he continued taking off the nightie, got down on his knees
and began to kiss her all over...."
>
then the frantic guy demands, "THEN WHAT HAPPENED?"
>
"Damned if I know. I got an erection and fell off my perch!"


Cheers - JJ

[mailman]