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Dr. Robert · 14 October 2013, 02:51 PM

Simple truth #1
Lovers help each other undress before sex.
However after sex, they always dress on their own.
Moral of the story: In life, no one helps you once you're screwed.

Simple truth #2
When a lady is pregnant, all her friends touch her stomach and say "congratulations"
But none of them touch the man's penis and say "good job"
Moral of the story: Hard work is never appreciated.

5 rules to remember in life.

1. Money can't buy happiness, but it's more comfortable to cry in a Bentley than on a bicycle.

2. Forgive your enemy, but remember the bastard's name.

3. If you help someone when they're in trouble, they will remember you when they're in trouble again.

4. Many people are alive only because it's illegal to shoot them.

5. Alcohol doesn't solve any problems, but then neither does milk.

And finally
Condoms don't guarantee safe sex. A friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot by the woman's husband.

GeraldJ19 · 14 October 2013, 03:07 PM

Made my day...excellent stuff

Psmith · 15 October 2013, 02:35 AM

bungcarlo · 15 October 2013, 03:46 AM

:-D lol

Foxy1 · 15 October 2013, 05:24 AM

Its all so true LOL

Hairdude1 · 15 October 2013, 12:54 PM

Very funny

cop414 · 15 October 2013, 01:01 PM

Excellent!!

FeelingTheBlues · 15 October 2013, 08:33 PM

77T · 17 October 2013, 03:26 AM

Rolexitis · 17 October 2013, 04:13 AM

DCgator · 17 October 2013, 04:18 AM

So true!

Bangel · 17 October 2013, 06:55 PM

1675-David · 17 October 2013, 06:58 PM

Chipmunk · 18 October 2013, 05:49 AM

polarinda · 4 November 2013, 01:45 AM

Wow

15 October 2013, 02:35 AM	#3
Psmith "TRF" Member Join Date: Sep 2008 Real Name: Clive Location: Exoplanet Watch: spring-driven Posts: 38,856	__________________

15 October 2013, 05:24 AM	#5
Foxy1 "TRF" Member Join Date: Mar 2013 Real Name: Steve Location: Everywhere Watch: Love them all Posts: 1,503	Its all so true LOL __________________ There is only one difference between a madman and me. The madman thinks he is sane. I know I am mad. Salvador Dali

15 October 2013, 01:01 PM	#7
cop414 TRF Moderator & 2024 SubLV41 Patron Join Date: Apr 2012 Real Name: Tim Location: Pennsylvania Watch: 14060M Posts: 72,234	Excellent!! __________________ Rolex Submariner 14060M Omega Seamaster 2254.50 DOXA Professional 1200T Card carrying member of TRF's Global Association of Retro-Grouch-Curmudgeons TRF's "After Dark" Bar & NightClub Patron P Club Member #17 2 FA ENABLED

15 October 2013, 08:33 PM	#8
FeelingTheBlues "TRF" Member Join Date: Sep 2011 Real Name: Carl Location: Always moving Watch: If you wish... Posts: 22,039	__________________ Mon corps c'est un pays en guerre sur l'point d'finir, Le général de l'armée de terre s'attend au pire, J'ai faim, j'ai frette, je suis trop faible pour me lever debout, On va hisser le drapeau blanc un point c'est tout. - André Fortin

17 October 2013, 03:26 AM	#9
77T 2024 SubLV41 Pledge Member Join Date: Dec 2010 Real Name: PaulG Location: Georgia Posts: 42,013	__________________ Does anyone really know what time it is?

14 October 2013, 02:51 PM	#1
Dr. Robert 2024 SubLV41 Pledge Member Join Date: Dec 2009 Real Name: Bob Location: U.S.A. Watch: 1655 Posts: 64,243	Sage advice Simple truth #1 Lovers help each other undress before sex. However after sex, they always dress on their own. Moral of the story: In life, no one helps you once you're screwed. Simple truth #2 When a lady is pregnant, all her friends touch her stomach and say "congratulations" But none of them touch the man's penis and say "good job" Moral of the story: Hard work is never appreciated. 5 rules to remember in life. 1. Money can't buy happiness, but it's more comfortable to cry in a Bentley than on a bicycle. 2. Forgive your enemy, but remember the bastard's name. 3. If you help someone when they're in trouble, they will remember you when they're in trouble again. 4. Many people are alive only because it's illegal to shoot them. 5. Alcohol doesn't solve any problems, but then neither does milk. And finally Condoms don't guarantee safe sex. A friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot by the woman's husband. __________________ Founder & Card Carrying Member of the Global Association of Retro-Grouch-Curmudgeons

14 October 2013, 03:07 PM	#2
GeraldJ19 "TRF" Member Join Date: Jan 2012 Real Name: Gerald Location: Okinawa Watch: Seiko Black Monste Posts: 123	Made my day...excellent stuff

15 October 2013, 03:46 AM	#4
bungcarlo "TRF" Member Join Date: Dec 2011 Real Name: Erwin Location: usa Watch: Sea Dweller Posts: 685	:-D lol

15 October 2013, 12:54 PM	#6
Hairdude1 "TRF" Member Join Date: Apr 2012 Real Name: Alex Location: Chicago Watch: AP,PP, Rolex Posts: 37,156	Very funny

17 October 2013, 04:13 AM	#10
Rolexitis "TRF" Member Join Date: May 2008 Real Name: Matt Location: Earth Watch: 114060 Posts: 3,203

17 October 2013, 04:18 AM	#11
DCgator "TRF" Member Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: PNW Watch: DS,BLNR,SubLV,DJ2 Posts: 8,123	So true!

17 October 2013, 06:55 PM	#12
Bangel "TRF" Member Join Date: Oct 2011 Location: Australia Watch: 116610LN Posts: 15,802

17 October 2013, 06:58 PM	#13
1675-David "TRF" Member Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: Stockholm Posts: 6,061

18 October 2013, 05:49 AM	#14
Chipmunk "TRF" Member Join Date: Feb 2010 Real Name: Alvin Location: So Cal Watch: ROLEXES Posts: 5,390	__________________ "A thing of beauty is a joy forever"............John Keats

4 November 2013, 01:45 AM	#15
polarinda "TRF" Member Join Date: Mar 2011 Real Name: Trav Location: singapore Watch: it Posts: 2,316	Wow

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