#%$(*!!! Skunks

Some of you may recall I posted a thread back around New Year's that I had a skunk living under my porch. The critter was sitting under our furnace intake/exhaust (cuz it's warm) and firing off stink bombs, that would then get sucked into the furnace and evenly distributed around the house.

Well, it took a week to trap the bastid but we got him and sealed up the access holes. A week later, the stench returned and when I went outside, I found a big hole, dug from the inside out. Yep, there was still another one in there that we didn't know about. We trapped him within 24 hours.

A week of bliss. The stench was fading, we washed all our clothes, linens, etc. And then we got the whiff of number three. Nope, he wasn't under our porch, but he wanted in desperately.

So my FIL and I skunk proofed the perimeter of the porch as best we could (considering the ground is mostly frozen). This guy couldn't get in. But he would hang out on our porch, firing off stinkers and then it would either waft in through our 35-year old windows, or get sucked back into the furnace.

A week of having live traps (four of them) on and around my porch. The bastid beat three of them at various times, eathing the bait but able to get out. So I spiked the bait to make sure that if he beat the traps, he'd meet his demise regardless. And then we got him.

Another week and a half of no smell, and then last night, WHAM! I went outside and footprints were everywhere in the snow. I found a hole, that was dug from the inside out (again) surfacing in the roots of the cedar bush. I filled it in with crushed limestone and added water (that combined with the -20C will make sure it's impassable) and called the trapper. I also left a litte spiked dinner for him. This a.m., he didn't take the bait, but he was around.

Fecking hell!!!! We'll get him tonight (I hope).

Sorry to hear about this John, but I did see on TV that the skunks had returned to Ottawa.........the head skunk announced his cabinet on Monday.

Originally Posted by Avalon

Sorry to hear about this John, but I did see on TV that the skunks had returned to Ottawa.........the head skunk announced his cabinet on Monday.

Well there's lots that stink about the head skunk. Oh and also the senator they grabbed, and the Liberal MP from Vancouver who jumped ship. I say they should run a by-election and see how the chips fall. In that riding, the PC candidate finished a very distant third. He should also pay back the $97K to the party.

Originally Posted by Atomic

Well there's lots that stink about the head skunk. Oh and also the senator they grabbed, and the Liberal MP from Vancouver who jumped ship. I say they should run a by-election and see how the chips fall. In that riding, the PC candidate finished a very distant third. He should also pay back the $97K to the party.

Said skunk (or weasel, whatever you prefer) has already stated that he will not stand in a by-election, and will not pay back the $97K he stole from the party (stealing in my mind - it's fraud).

Originally Posted by Avalon

Said skunk (or weasel, whatever you prefer) has already stated that he will not stand in a by-election, and will not pay back the $97K he stole from the party (stealing in my mind - it's fraud).

So much for 'cleaning up' government and accountability. Yep, I have confidence in this caucus.

[dman]

Paul is a mailman so he is more likely to have a gun than CJ, borrow it and kill the f'ing thing already.

Originally Posted by dman

Paul is a mailman so he is more likely to have a gun than CJ, borrow it and kill the f'ing thing already.

Sadly, the likelihood of a neighbour complaining is very high... and I'd be charged with cruelty to animals. Seriously. Otherwise, I would have bashed the last one's brains in with my shovel one of the four times I chased him away.

[dman]

Originally Posted by Atomic

Sadly, the likelihood of a neighbour complaining is very high... and I'd be charged with cruelty to animals. Seriously. Otherwise, I would have bashed the last one's brains in with my shovel one of the four times I chased him away.

That is nuts, just say the skunk ate you pet rat and you were trying to protect it from eating your pet mouse.

Originally Posted by dman

That is nuts, just say the skunk ate you pet rat and you were trying to protect it from eating your pet mouse.

Actually I've called the city AND the province to complain about bold, 'rabid' skunks chasing my daughter on my property and they said 'too bad' and 'hire a trapper.'

This is Canada dammit.... the government HAS to fix it! Seriously though, I pay over $5,000 a year in property taxes. Since rabid skunks are a threat to public safety, they should be doing something with my effing money .

[dman]

Originally Posted by Atomic

Actually I've called the city AND the province to complain about bold, 'rabid' skunks chasing my daughter on my property and they said 'too bad' and 'hire a trapper.'

This is Canada dammit.... the government HAS to fix it! Seriously though, I pay over $5,000 a year in property taxes. Since rabid skunks are a threat to public safety, they should be doing something with my effing money .

That is brutal, maybe your mailman will smell it and go nuts, those mailpeople tend to lose it quite often ya know?

Originally Posted by dman

That is brutal, maybe your mailman will smell it and go nuts, those mailpeople tend to lose it quite often ya know?

That's what I'm secretly hoping for. I think the more senior letter carriers are armed.

[dman]

Originally Posted by Atomic

That's what I'm secretly hoping for. I think the more senior letter carriers are armed.

I heard it was a normal deal to carry in NJ.

[C.J.]

Originally Posted by dman

I heard it was a normal deal to carry in NJ.

Only for ex-felons. The rest of need pistol permits,which are about as easy to obtain as a ride in Airforce One.

I would think you're best bet would be the mailman though, John. Here in the states assault rifles are as common to them as comfy shoes.

[dman]

Originally Posted by C.J.

Only for ex-felons. The rest of need pistol permits,which are about as easy to obtain as a ride in Airforce One.

I would think you're best bet would be the mailman though, John. Here in the states assault rifles are as common to them as comfy shoes.

I would not want to ride in that plane anyway.

[C.J.]

Originally Posted by dman

I would not want to ride in that plane anyway.

[Goodwatch]

Originally Posted by Atomic

Fecking hell!!!! We'll get him tonight (I hope).

I feel sorry for you John, those critters must really be a pest! Do they really smell as bad as people say? Now I just hope my other prayer gets answered too and Washington DC and New York will suffer from a sudden skunk plague

Originally Posted by Goodwatch

I feel sorry for you John, those critters must really be a pest! Do they really smell as bad as people say? Now I just hope my other prayer gets answered too and Washington DC and New York will suffer from a sudden skunk plague

Frans, you cannot believe how ripe their smell is. I mean, when I was a news reporter I was at a few crime scenes with decomposing bodies, and the smell of a skunk is worse than that. When in close enough contact, the stench can actually reduce you to tears. And the only thing that can make the smell go away is time.

The thing is too, because the smell comes from a fluid, sprayed by the skunk, when it freezes, the smell goes away. But as it melts and changes back into a liquid (from a solid) the fumes are re-released. Same thing with fluid that gets buried.

If you actually get the liquid on your clothes, you have to throw them out. Because the smell is being circulated around the house, we've had to wash absolutely everything, clothes, jackets, linens and towels... even sitting in my office now, I can smell my jacket which is about two meters away from me.

THere are only three people I can think of on whom I'd wish this pox. It's THAT unpleasant.

[Goodwatch]

Originally Posted by Atomic

Frans, you cannot *SNIP* John's story *SNIP*

How about the watch dude? (We're alone in this thread, you can tell me )

WTF? Hot metal and oil? Kinky!

[mailman]

Originally Posted by dman

That is brutal, maybe your mailman will smell it and go nuts, those mailpeople tend to lose it quite often ya know?

Yes it's true but we only take out our aggressions on our supervisors

[mailman]

Originally Posted by Atomic

That's what I'm secretly hoping for. I think the more senior letter carriers are armed.

Who called?

[Launch Mini]

You cannot even begin to describe a skunk smell.
Putrid is a mild case.
If your unfortunate enough to actually get it on your skin. Life is over for a while.
Can we arrange to ship some frozen skunk spray to JJ??

[dman]

Originally Posted by mailman

Yes it's true but we only take out our aggressions on our supervisors

Should I laugh or call 911?

[JJ Irani]

Originally Posted by Launch Mini

You cannot even begin to describe a skunk smell.
Putrid is a mild case.
If your unfortunate enough to actually get it on your skin. Life is over for a while.
Can we arrange to ship some frozen skunk spray to JJ??

Hey tosser,

How come I keep getting dragged into all your fracas?

Not to resurrect an old thread, but yesterday we trapped skunk number four.

This morning I went out to get the paper and was greeted by skunk number five.