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Old 22 May 2022, 01:24 PM   #1
rolio
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Divorcing

After almost 40 years of marriage, I am separated/divorcing. I had to sell my Classic 16710. It broke my heart to sell my prized watch but needed the cash. One day, again. Anyone been through this
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Old 22 May 2022, 01:32 PM   #2
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Sorry to hear. Never an easy thing.
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Old 22 May 2022, 01:40 PM   #3
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Old 22 May 2022, 02:07 PM   #4
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Old 22 May 2022, 02:15 PM   #5
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Wow. Sorry to hear. That's got to be tough to reconcile (the divorce) after so long.
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Old 22 May 2022, 02:21 PM   #6
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Been there and, for me, it was the best thing that could have happened to me.

Also spent 20 years doing divorce and family law.

Life will be different for sure. Things will be tough for awhile but eventually get better and one day you may likely even feel your new life is better than you could ever have imagined.

Every single guy for whom I handled a divorce, and there have been 30-40, eventually realized that they had settled for a less than ideal situation or been unhappy for years. Even those guys who did not want the divorce initially. Every single one was actually happier AFTER the divorce. It may take a year or two, but I believe you will get there as well.

Don’t be afraid to get counseling as you go through this. It is hard and I really think the people who came out of this the best were those who tackled the grief and heartache head on with help.

Good luck.
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Old 22 May 2022, 02:45 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rolio View Post
After almost 40 years of marriage, I am separated/divorcing. I had to sell my Classic 16710. It broke my heart to sell my prized watch but needed the cash. One day, again. Anyone been through this
I do hope it settles quickly for you and your family.
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Old 22 May 2022, 04:17 PM   #8
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I am sorry man, I am divorced, but, well, she got pregnant by another man while I was overseas fighting a war and ran off with him, I never saw her again. In some ways that was the best thing that could have happened. Anyway, this thread is about you, not me. I hope the best for you, I can only imagine how difficult it is… but, well, I hope things work out very quickly. As for the watch, you will get another, keep the faith.
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Old 22 May 2022, 04:33 PM   #9
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Jasonindenver has nailed it, will take up to two years. Good luck with it all.
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Old 22 May 2022, 06:10 PM   #10
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Not a divorce but a few breakups

I got over my first breakup by swimming / cycling. Rather than come home from work & think about things. I’d pack my trunks & head to the local swimming pool or get the bike out for a 2 hour cycle. The key is something to immerse yourself in & take your mind off it. Sometimes not too healthy to think too much for too long.

Good luck & all the best. Hope you start a new watch fund soon
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Old 22 May 2022, 06:21 PM   #11
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Sorry to hear man…I wish you the best of luck. And I do hope that everything will get easier for you soon
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Old 22 May 2022, 06:28 PM   #12
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Sorry to hear it brother. Some advice: delete Facebook, hit the gym, and be positive.


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Old 22 May 2022, 07:02 PM   #13
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Sorry to hear it brother. Some advice: delete Facebook, hit the gym, and be positive.


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spot on advice !

i divorced ca. 6 years ago, it doesn't have to be a total drama.

as long as you create yourself a path towards a rebound (and don't self pity too much), things will be good again
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Old 22 May 2022, 08:54 PM   #14
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Better days ahead OP. I hope you can settle things amicably and that if kids are involved you can both be at your best to support them.

Onward and upward, stay positive
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Old 22 May 2022, 08:55 PM   #15
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…wishing you strength during this time…and hope things will be amicable between you both.

use this space to vent if need be as I am sure there will be support here.
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Old 22 May 2022, 09:00 PM   #16
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Going through it now.

There is a path to reconciliation, but it’s a long one. And the last year has been a challenge, to say the least.

Ups and downs for sure. Just when you think things suck, they start to look up. Then when you think the bad times are over, you get a sucker punch and they begin anew.

Deleting social media is definitely great advice. So is going to the gym and starting some positive habits.
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Old 22 May 2022, 09:05 PM   #17
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Sorry. But things will get better.
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Old 22 May 2022, 10:01 PM   #18
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I have gone through it as well, and it is not easy.

The best thing you can do is focus on yourself and not the situation. Do not isolate yourself either; stay close with your friends and reach out when you need to. The advice to delete/stay away from social media is spot on because there may be times you find yourself looking, questioning, and getting sucked into what is going on. Take some time for the gym and yourself.

Lastly, know that it sucks, but know that better days are coming and that you will be alright.
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Old 22 May 2022, 10:19 PM   #19
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So sorry to hear. Sometimes what seems like a bad thing is a good thing. I was fired from my first job. I soon got a job with a much better firm and I was inspired to later start my own firm. I had a very successful career and retired early. You may be thanking your ex-wife for putting you on a better path.
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Old 22 May 2022, 10:26 PM   #20
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I'm sorry to hear. I hope you find yourself in a much better place.
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Old 22 May 2022, 10:26 PM   #21
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Old 23 May 2022, 01:07 AM   #22
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I know all about it, it hurts plenty.
Watches are just things, not important. Wish you well
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Old 23 May 2022, 01:11 AM   #23
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Move to a 55 and up community. You’ll have more “dates” and free food than you can imagine.


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Old 23 May 2022, 01:12 AM   #24
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JasoninDenver View Post
Been there and, for me, it was the best thing that could have happened to me.

Also spent 20 years doing divorce and family law.

Life will be different for sure. Things will be tough for awhile but eventually get better and one day you may likely even feel your new life is better than you could ever have imagined.

Every single guy for whom I handled a divorce, and there have been 30-40, eventually realized that they had settled for a less than ideal situation or been unhappy for years. Even those guys who did not want the divorce initially. Every single one was actually happier AFTER the divorce. It may take a year or two, but I believe you will get there as well.

Don’t be afraid to get counseling as you go through this. It is hard and I really think the people who came out of this the best were those who tackled the grief and heartache head on with help.

Good luck.
Thoughtful words.

Any life change, relationship or job or home in my experience takes a minimum of a year to start to settle in. Best of luck to you.
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Old 23 May 2022, 01:25 AM   #25
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Been there brother. Sucks especially if kids are involved

My 2 kids I’d label as “daddy’s boys” so that was toughest part granted the child support and alimony wasn’t/isnt fun either

But I bought a newer bigger house about 1.5 miles down the road to make my kids feel better and maybe also throw some shade her way

As one O P stated the first 1-2 years are the worst but I promise it will get better. Ironically enough I found a beautiful woman 15 years younger with no kids and life has been absolutely wonderful. We’ve traveled the world when I never did with the other woman and life has been a true blessing. Plus the alimony ended and I’m down to 3 more years of child support with only one kid.

Point being the early days can suck but it will get better and just maybe the next chapter will be the best to come.
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Old 23 May 2022, 01:28 AM   #26
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Happens to the best of us — the statistics say that men tend to recover faster financially or even do better post-divorce — just takes some time. Personally I’m doing 100x better after, in all aspects (emotionally, spiritually, etc.). Just going to take time to grieve and realize you are your own person and are more than half of a couple.
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Old 23 May 2022, 03:00 AM   #27
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Every single guy for whom I handled a divorce, and there have been 30-40, eventually realized that they had settled for a less than ideal situation or been unhappy for years.
Perhaps that's the saddest part .. " been unhappy for years ... "

Life is short and unhappy years do not count.

All the best to the OP .
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Old 23 May 2022, 03:19 AM   #28
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Sorry to hear. I'm in the starting phase myself. We recently separated after 23 years of marriage and almost 27 years together. Counseling has been very helpful for me.
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Old 23 May 2022, 03:30 AM   #29
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Quote:
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After almost 40 years of marriage, I am separated/divorcing. I had to sell my Classic 16710. It broke my heart to sell my prized watch but needed the cash. One day, again. Anyone been through this
This is terrible. My dad told me to get a prenuptial when I got married in 2007 im glad i listened. Sucks selling that watch I hope you find another soon.
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Old 23 May 2022, 03:31 AM   #30
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Fire and Forget!!!!!
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