Is there such a thing as gender disappointment

[stephentross]

And am I a bad person for slightly feeling this.

My wife is now 26 weeks pregnant and

drum roll.

ITS A GIRL.

I am very excited. We found out last week. And every day I am excited to have a daddy's girl and I have no doubt I am wrapped around her finger. Her finger is very small and already, I feel this tremendous amount of love.

I also have a new found respect for all women. Amazing what you feel when you have a daughter on the way.

When I first found out however. I had swaying mixed emotions and really wanted a boy. My wife was a little upset that I felt that way, I think it is normal eh?

[Bangel]

How many times have we heard from people that they "were hoping for a boy" or that they "really wanted a girl?"

To me, in these situations, having some initial disappoint and/or mixed feelings would be completely expected.

So long as one comes to realise, as you have, that you will love your child unconditionally, then that's all that matters.

A word of warning though: Dealing with unexpected situations arising from your children, I think, is a never ending part of being a parent!

Congratulations to you and your wife.

[ducatidoc]

Pefectly normal. Most first time dads are hoping for a "chip off the ol' block", mostly, I think, because the figure they'll know better how to handle raising a child of the same gender. That being said, there's a reason why the phrase " daddy's little girl" was invented. Turns out dads do pretty good with daughters.

[jolimont]

its alright!

Just name your child Kim or Ashley

btw congrats

[Kingair]

Originally Posted by stephentross

And am I a bad person for slightly feeling this.

My wife is now 26 weeks pregnant and

drum roll.

ITS A GIRL.

I am very excited. We found out last week. And every day I am excited to have a daddy's girl and I have no doubt I am wrapped around her finger. Her finger is very small and already, I feel this tremendous amount of love.

I also have a new found respect for all women. Amazing what you feel when you have a daughter on the way.

When I first found out however. I had swaying mixed emotions and really wanted a boy. My wife was a little upset that I felt that way, I think it is normal eh?

Congrats

I always wanted a girl myself . . . and lucky I was !

I actually didn't want a boy because I hate soccer . . . honestly that's the truth . .

Enjoy as much as you can . . . since time keep ticking and soon she will be 18 . . . ;-)

HAGT

[swatty]

No gender disappoint here, just be happy to have a healthy, a happy child , girl or boy
Congrats in advance

[stephentross]

Thanks all.

I am not disappointed at all, really.

As one person stated. I am very thankful for our little one to be growing fully healthy. No issues. That is a blessing right there alone.

Cant wait to actually hold her.

[mailman]

Congratulations For starters, after seeing childbirth...I have much respect for any woman that went thru it

Our daughter just turned one. When we found out we were having a girl, I couldn't have been more excited. We were just happy to be having a baby, gender didn't matter. One year later, I wouldn't trade our girl for ten boys

Just remember, you can teach a girl to do the same thing as boys if you like. Play sports, fix things etc. She won't have any limitations based on her gender

[dddrees]

Hey, when my wife first told me she was pregnant I told her I only made boys. I told her that the man decides what sex the child will be and because I was a mans man we were going to have only boys.

This joke saw us through all three of our boys.


Truth be known, had any or all of our boys been girls, I would have been just as happy as long as they were healthy.


I think we wish for boys, because it's easier on one hand to work with the known vs the unknown. Of course in my case part of it was bravado as well.


Glad to hear you have embraced you little girl. I can't imagine you would have done anything less.

[esm]

At the end of the day - as long as the baby is healthy. That's all it matters.

[dddrees]

That reminds me.

3rd child, no lie.

I called my wife from Germany when she was in Texas, once after waking up in a cold sweat. I had a nightmare.

Not only was she pregnant, it was a girl. When getting a hold of my wife, she said she had a surprise. I said I know your pregnant, don't worry its a girl. She said how do you know it will be a girl, I said how did I know you were pregnant??? The same way I know your pregnant I know it will be a girl.


Anyway later she had an Ultra sound. She come sup to me when I was at work, and she was crying. I said I know you found out it was a boy, and she said yes and she was upset that I told her it was going to be a girl. I said look, I told you long ago I only make boys.

[seand442]

I'd be lying if I said I didn't want a boy, but after having twin girls, I'm perfectly happy. I don't understand women as it is, so I was a little scared at the thought of having girls, I guess. (OK, Really I was freaking out.)As said before, I can teach them the same things I would a boy and their car insurance will be a little cheaper. Of course, ask me what I think when they enter that adolescent stage and you may get a different answer.

[crew]

Originally Posted by esm

at the end of the day - as long as the baby is healthy. That's all it matters.

x2

[SUBversive]

Originally Posted by stephentross

Thanks all.

I am not disappointed at all, really.

As one person stated. I am very thankful for our little one to be growing fully healthy. No issues. That is a blessing right there alone.

Cant wait to actually hold her.

I understand. But think its more of a society expectation. People need something to say so they talk this gender identification bs. You need a boy to run the farm etc. but in reality it really doesn't matter. Health is the only thing. With our first child I truly did not care. I had people tell me all the time oh is it a boy, you want a boy. Etc. usually I would get that from women too. I thought that was odd. The only thing I resisted and do me a favor do it too: don't buy those pink tee shirts that say daddy's girl or stuff like that....

Best of luck and congratulations. Also take heart in the fact that women can and do wear men's rolex models now so I hope to give my gmt i was wearing on the day she was born to my daughter at some point.

[conrail]

Well you want a boy to continue your family name, nothing wrong w/ that. But in the end I suppose just be happy to have a healthy normal kid!

[Lisa]

Three girls and we're at the end of the line with our family's surname. Maybe they'll marry progressive guys who will change their names.

I used to work with a girl who was dead-set on having a son. She got pregnant the first time; a girl. Got pregnant again; another girl. I still remember her words at this point: "I'm going to have a boy no matter what!" So she got pregnant again... with TWINS.....



...identical girls.

[dddrees]

Originally Posted by Lisa

Three girls and we're at the end of the line with our family's surname. Maybe they'll marry progressive guys who will change their names.

I used to work with a girl who was dead-set on having a son. She got pregnant the first time; a girl. Got pregnant again; another girl. I still remember her words at this point: "I'm going to have a boy no matter what!" So she got pregnant again... with TWINS.....



...identical girls.

Maybe me and my wife should contact them and arrange for a trade.

[Art 1]

I have enjoyed both very much but there is something a little extra special for a dad in having a daughter, I think. It changes a man in a certain way.

[Tri-Tip]

Originally Posted by Kingair

Congrats

I always wanted a girl myself . . . and lucky I was !

I actually didn't want a boy because I hate soccer . . . honestly that's the truth . .

Enjoy as much as you can . . . since time keep ticking and soon she will be 18 . . . ;-)

HAGT

You could get kicked out of Belgium for making a statement like that.

[chicfarmer1]

Stephen, I guarantee you that when you hold that little darling for the first time you will be utterly amnesiac about thinking you wanted someone other than her. Big congrats.

[kilyung]

Congrats. Just remember gender selection is your responsibility so don't blame the wife!

I've got a great daughter who's into martial arts, sports, and other "father/son" type activities. She's the sunshine of my life. PS: I am REALLY dreading her dating years.

[tudorluv]

always wanted a boy, have two teenage daughters, wouldn't trade 'em for the world

you'll see

congratulations!

[HRV]

when I read the name of the thread, I thought to myself, no I haven't !
But I bet some guys in Thailand could have been

But on a serious note, your feelings are normal and I admit to have had them, but now my 3 daughters are all in there 20's and as others have said I wouldn't change them for the world

PS as Mike says, it takes a man to make a woman

[skypilot]

You've got your work cut out for you. I raised one of each. The boy was a breeze but I thought the girl was going to spend her life in prison. She was 13 the first time I had to retrieve her from the police station. She turned out great and I am very proud of her --- now.
My wife was one of 7 girls, no boys, and neither of her parents lived to 65.

[Lisa]

Originally Posted by kilyung

Congrats. Just remember gender selection is your responsibility so don't blame the wife!

I've got a great daughter who's into martial arts, sports, and other "father/son" type activities. She's the sunshine of my life. PS: I am REALLY dreading her dating years.

Have you seen that "Permission to Date My Daughter" handout?

[Watchdog]

You are blessed to have a happy, healthy child of any gender.

[MichaelB_Can]

I have 3 boys ! My wife wanted a girl really bad. But I'm thinking our boys will have girls so we can spoil them . You will get what you want , it might just take a little time ! ....... & you can always try again !


Mike B , Canada ⌚

[Wineman]

Originally Posted by Kingair

Congrats

I
I actually didn't want a boy because I hate soccer . . . honestly that's the truth . .

Girls play soccer, ask Hope Solo!

[SUBversive]

Originally Posted by kilyung

Congrats. Just remember gender selection is your responsibility so don't blame the wife!

I've got a great daughter who's into martial arts, sports, and other "father/son" type activities. She's the sunshine of my life. PS: I am REALLY dreading her dating years.

Just give her one of your watches so she will know when curfew is....

[ChuckFinlay]

I have a girl here, just turned 16, and she's still a daddies girl. I look at her sometimes and can't imagine a 16yr old boy still wanting cuddles and making my heart melt every time I look at him, so for me, a girl is great...but as others have said, healthy is what matters!