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7 November 2006, 03:38 AM | #1 |
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Join Date: May 2005
Real Name: God
Location: Washington, D.C.
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Signs of the Times
Sign over a Gynecologist's Office: "Dr. Jones, at your cervix." ************************** In a Podiatrist's office: "Time wounds all heels." ************************** On a Septic Tank Truck in Oregon : Yesterday's Meals on Wheels ************ ************** On another Septic Tank Truck: "We're #1 in the #2 business" ************************** At a Proctologist's door: "To expedite your visit please back in." ************************** On a Plumber's truck: "We repair what your husband fixed." ************************** On another Plumber's truck: "Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.." On a Church's Billboard: "7 days without God makes one weak." At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee: "Invite us to your next blowout." On a Plastic Surgeon's Office door: "Hello. Can we pick your nose?" At a Towing company: "We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows." ************************** On an Electrician's truck: "Let us remove your shorts." ************************** In a Nonsmoking Area: "If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action." ******* ******************* On a Maternity Room door: "Push. Push. Push." ************************** At an Optometrist's Office : "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place." ************************** On a Taxidermist's window: "We really know our stuff." ************************** On a Fence: "Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive!" ************************** At a Car Dealership: "The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment." ************************** Outside a Muffler Shop: "No appointment necessary. We hear you coming." ************************** In a Veterinarian's waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!" At the Electric Company : "We would be delighted if you send in your payment. However, if you don't, you will be." ************************** In a Restaurant window : "Don't stand there and be hungry, Come on in and get fed up." ************************** In the front yard of a Funeral Home : "Drive carefully. We'll wait. " ************************* At a Propane Filling Station , "Thank heaven for little grills." ************************** And don't forget the sign at a Chicago Radiator Shop: " Best place in town to take a leak "
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