Getting Dad to love his Rolex again

[Travelair007]

I’m not crying, you are!!! what a touching story. Thank you for sharing. I’m sure he appreciates the gesture.

I can only relate to a very distant parallel with my father, who would only admire the Rolex I got him and never wore it. It took many years for me to understand that he felt he didn’t deserve it and felt the money could have gone to help others.

His guilt seeped right into me and I felt (and still feel) quite guilty.

[bobbyandy]

Thanks all for reading my long story and for your kind and thoughtful responses. You have helped me further appreciate that my father-in-law loves his Rolex in his own way and I'm glad he does. Cheers!

[dnpina]

Great story. Hope he wears it again for many years

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[envuks]

This is a really great story and it’s clear your efforts were coming from a place of love.

Have you asked him why he no longer wears the watch when he used to wear it daily and swimmingly loved it? I’d be very curious to hear his thoughts on why.


Thanks for sharing this story

[Pilliam]

What a kind and selfless act. You're a good soul.

[bobbyandy]

A couple people asked why I hadn't asked him why he doesn't wear the watch. I guess I didn't want to broach that subject in case it's a negative thing for him in some way.

A part of it might be in line with Travelair007 who mentioned guilt or not feeling worthy. Maybe it came back so shiny that he didn't want it to cause negative attention with his peers? Probably a mix of lots of reasons I'd guess.

I think if I get up the courage to ask him to take it out and talk about it, I might ask him why it hasn't made it back on his wrist if I can do it in a way that doesn't make him feel awkward. Hopefully I can convey my appreciation that he enjoys it in his own way and I don't expect him to wear it if he'd rather keep it safe in the box occasionally getting it out to look at it.

[dman]

Awesome story!!


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[Setarip]

Beautiful story. Thank you for sharing.

Not sure of your father-in-laws age, but one thing I’ve noticed about my own father (90 yrs old) and my father-in-law (84)...as it relates to watches, is that they both prefer cheaper, large dial watches for ease of telling time.

Two years ago I bought my father-in-law an IWC Mk 18 Le Petit Prince with the larger dial and numbers. He was very grateful, loved it and wore it daily since the dial was large, like his $50 Timex. After a year he said it was losing time and stopped wearing it. He sent it to me so I could have it serviced.

There were two things I learned: 1) he didn’t have the dexterity any longer to pinch/push and screw the crown down so it was open/unlocked (likely affecting time); and 2) his sedentary lifestyle at 84 was likely affecting the loss of time. I did get the watch checked out. It was fine and keeping time with regs. I showed him how to screw the crown in and explained the importance. He’s wearing the watch daily again.

I was going to gift a new DJ to my dad this year, but the AD asked about his daily routine, etc. and suggested I hold off. At 90 he likely wouldn’t have enough movement (even though he is still mobile) to keep the watch in time.

Anyhow, I’m happy for you and your father-in-law. Great story.

[Wahlberg]

I would love to see some pictures! Great story.

The one thing though, I'm doubting (but that's the way you told the story) if it should have been polished and looked like new again.

[joli160]

Originally Posted by Wahlberg

I would love to see some pictures! Great story.

The one thing though, I'm doubting (but that's the way you told the story) if it should have been polished and looked like new again.

I think there is no fun in presenting an old worn looking watch after a service. Anti polishing is a typical TRF thing

In the real world everybody likes a new looking watch.
For this reason virtually all watches for sale have been touched up one way or another

[fskywalker]

Originally Posted by bobbyandy

Warning- long post.



My wife’s dad received a Rolex back in the early 90s. It was a gift from a grateful group in the city where he lived, given for something heroic and selfless that he had done (an exciting story for another time). The watch was a Stainless Steel Datejust inscribed on the back with his name, date, and some details of the gift.



Some people in his social circle gave him a bit of grief, ribbing him about such a large sum of money spent on a watch (about $3-4k at the time) that could have been spent on something “useful and practical” if he had only been given the choice between a check and a watch.



I think he was initially thinking the same thing because he considered selling it back to the AD where it had been purchased. Someone (not me) told him that it couldn’t be sold once engraved so he shrugged, kept the Rolex and started wearing it.



It soon became his daily companion and he grew to cherish it over the years. When he and my mother-in-law were able to travel abroad a few years later, he made a point to dip it in several oceans (not sure exactly why but it was quite a big deal to him) even once lowering it on a rope from a pier so he could dip it in the ocean where there was no easy beach access to the water.



Things like this added to the growing story of his life adventures and I enjoyed every time he shared a bit of his story with me. He never babied his Rolex but fearlessly wore it doing everything life could throw at him and he never had it serviced, adjusted, or even inspected.



Some 20+ years later when it finally started losing minutes per day, he quietly put it back in the original Rolex box and kept it in a drawer. I think the ribbing about the expense years ago along with his old school “useful and practical” mindset kept him from spending any money fixing such a luxury item. He switched to using a quartz watch that he received while helping USA athletes at the Winter Olympics (another great story).



A few years later, I convinced my very gracious mother-in-law to bring the watch to us on one of their visits to see the grandkids – a secret mission done without my father-in-law’s knowledge. Once we had it in our possession, my wife and I took the watch to the local Rolex AD and they sent it off to the Dallas RSC for a long-overdue service.



It came back in amazing shape a few weeks later and, as they had since returned home, I mailed it back to him hoping that it would once again become his daily wrist companion.



We got a phone call when he received it and at first it seemed like we lost the connection. There was a long pause on the phone as he could hardly get the words out, he was so choked up with emotion. He thanked us for the kindness we had shown him in getting his Rolex fixed and I truly believe he was genuinely pleased with the result. He seemed very glad to have his Rolex working again. Mission accomplished - wear it in good health I thought.



Come to find out, he put it back in the box and put it in a drawer and never wore it as far as I know. I saw it last year after they moved to our city (a blessing to have them so close now) and it’s still in the original Rolex box looking brand new, as it did upon its return from the RSC.



My father-in-law told me recently that he occasionally takes his Rolex out of the box to admire it and reminisce and thanked me again for getting it fixed. I have yet to see it back on his wrist.



Occasionally in a quiet moment, I have thoughts second guessing myself and wondering if I overstepped with my clandestine RSC mission. Did I ruin it for him getting it fixed? I don’t think so (I certainly hope not) and I don’t regret that we got it fixed, but I just can’t shake the thought of that beautiful watch sitting in a box when it had been on his wrist for so long. He could be making more memories with it now. A Rolex like that with such a cool story is meant to be worn and loved and used in the course of a life well lived…just like it had been for over two decades.



At the end of the day, it’s his watch and I should be glad that he fearlessly wore it for as long as he did and respect that he continues to enjoy it in his own way and on his own terms. Maybe it’s not about getting him to love his Rolex again. Maybe it’s about me finally embracing the way he now chooses to remember and cherish the journey and all the life experiences and adventures he’s had with it over the years. Perhaps I’ll convince him to get it out next time I’m over and he can share more life stories with me. I would like that very much.



If you made it all the way to the end, thank you.

You did good! Hopefully he will go from admiring it to wearing it again soon!


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[schoolboy]

Great story OP, thanks for sharing that with us.

I wonder if he might feel guilty to use the watch and scratch it up again because you paid for the overhaul?

I would try to ask him why he doesn’t use it, and explain that I serviced it so that he could make new memories with it and so that it would look fresh again, and keep good time!

Maybe that way he starts using it without guilt

But I don’t know, that’s just my assumption

[GGGMT]

Originally Posted by bobbyandy

Thanks all for reading my long story and for your kind and thoughtful responses. You have helped me further appreciate that my father-in-law loves his Rolex in his own way and I'm glad he does. Cheers!

Wonderful story. Would love to see a picture


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[schoolboy]

Originally Posted by WatchGuy1966

Stories like this are the best part of TRF

Agree


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[schoolboy]

Originally Posted by Max7857

Great story and thanks for sharing. I had a similar situation surprise outcome from my own father. He as owned a Pepsi for 45+ years and although he has some other nice watches this has always been his favorite and daily wearer. A couple of years back it stop keeping accurate time. We both went together to the AD and when he heard how much the service was he said he didn’t want to spend the money. I was surprised as he could easily afford it. Instead he bought some $100 no name quartz watch.

Periodically over the next year we would discuss his Rolex but still he was never willing to get it serviced. I had never really been a Rolex guy but my wife was about to retire and she always wanted a Rolex so I bought her one. In the process I stumbled across this forum. I got interested in a couple of watches for myself which I bought and in conversation I told the AD the story about my father and his Pepsi and how I would like to buy one for him thinking he certainly couldn’t refuse that!

Well the AD was sympathetic to my story and after a two month wait I had a brand new BLRO in January of this year to present to my father for his birthday. Much to my surprise my father told me how much he appreciated the gesture and enjoyed the story of how difficult they are to obtain but that I should keep it and think of him when I wear it. Kind of anti climatic and not really the way I wanted to obtain a Pepsi. In fact I wasn’t really in the market. I haven’t really brought myself to wear it yet but I’m sure I’ll come around. The good news though is that it has brought us countless hours of conversation on all brands of watches and looking at them on the internet. he especially likes some of the Bell and Ross models.

I guess certain watches must be like certain songs. Specific to certain points in our lives and then archived to our memories only to be played in our minds.

That is very interesting. Thanks for sharing that with us.

I wonder if your dad merely wants you to enjoy a new Pepsi as he one day did.

[schoolboy]

Originally Posted by Setarip

Beautiful story. Thank you for sharing.

Not sure of your father-in-laws age, but one thing I’ve noticed about my own father (90 yrs old) and my father-in-law (84)...as it relates to watches, is that they both prefer cheaper, large dial watches for ease of telling time.

Two years ago I bought my father-in-law an IWC Mk 18 Le Petit Prince with the larger dial and numbers. He was very grateful, loved it and wore it daily since the dial was large, like his $50 Timex. After a year he said it was losing time and stopped wearing it. He sent it to me so I could have it serviced.

There were two things I learned: 1) he didn’t have the dexterity any longer to pinch/push and screw the crown down so it was open/unlocked (likely affecting time); and 2) his sedentary lifestyle at 84 was likely affecting the loss of time. I did get the watch checked out. It was fine and keeping time with regs. I showed him how to screw the crown in and explained the importance. He’s wearing the watch daily again.

I was going to gift a new DJ to my dad this year, but the AD asked about his daily routine, etc. and suggested I hold off. At 90 he likely wouldn’t have enough movement (even though he is still mobile) to keep the watch in time.

Anyhow, I’m happy for you and your father-in-law. Great story.

Have you considered buying your dad the Datejust and a watch winder?

He could put the winder by the bed, and put the watch in there at night.

In the morning he just puts in back on his wrist and repeat.


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[Rori]

Love wat you and your wife have done. I'm sure this watch will get on his wrist again.
Now we hope to hear the other 2 stories ;-)

Originally Posted by bobbyandy

Warning- long post.

My wife’s dad received a Rolex back in the early 90s. It was a gift from a grateful group in the city where he lived, given for something heroic and selfless that he had done (an exciting story for another time). The watch was a Stainless Steel Datejust inscribed on the back with his name, date, and some details of the gift.

Some people in his social circle gave him a bit of grief, ribbing him about such a large sum of money spent on a watch (about $3-4k at the time) that could have been spent on something “useful and practical” if he had only been given the choice between a check and a watch.

I think he was initially thinking the same thing because he considered selling it back to the AD where it had been purchased. Someone (not me) told him that it couldn’t be sold once engraved so he shrugged, kept the Rolex and started wearing it.

It soon became his daily companion and he grew to cherish it over the years. When he and my mother-in-law were able to travel abroad a few years later, he made a point to dip it in several oceans (not sure exactly why but it was quite a big deal to him) even once lowering it on a rope from a pier so he could dip it in the ocean where there was no easy beach access to the water.

Things like this added to the growing story of his life adventures and I enjoyed every time he shared a bit of his story with me. He never babied his Rolex but fearlessly wore it doing everything life could throw at him and he never had it serviced, adjusted, or even inspected.

Some 20+ years later when it finally started losing minutes per day, he quietly put it back in the original Rolex box and kept it in a drawer. I think the ribbing about the expense years ago along with his old school “useful and practical” mindset kept him from spending any money fixing such a luxury item. He switched to using a quartz watch that he received while helping USA athletes at the Winter Olympics (another great story).

A few years later, I convinced my very gracious mother-in-law to bring the watch to us on one of their visits to see the grandkids – a secret mission done without my father-in-law’s knowledge. Once we had it in our possession, my wife and I took the watch to the local Rolex AD and they sent it off to the Dallas RSC for a long-overdue service.

It came back in amazing shape a few weeks later and, as they had since returned home, I mailed it back to him hoping that it would once again become his daily wrist companion.

We got a phone call when he received it and at first it seemed like we lost the connection. There was a long pause on the phone as he could hardly get the words out, he was so choked up with emotion. He thanked us for the kindness we had shown him in getting his Rolex fixed and I truly believe he was genuinely pleased with the result. He seemed very glad to have his Rolex working again. Mission accomplished - wear it in good health I thought.

Come to find out, he put it back in the box and put it in a drawer and never wore it as far as I know. I saw it last year after they moved to our city (a blessing to have them so close now) and it’s still in the original Rolex box looking brand new, as it did upon its return from the RSC.

My father-in-law told me recently that he occasionally takes his Rolex out of the box to admire it and reminisce and thanked me again for getting it fixed. I have yet to see it back on his wrist.

Occasionally in a quiet moment, I have thoughts second guessing myself and wondering if I overstepped with my clandestine RSC mission. Did I ruin it for him getting it fixed? I don’t think so (I certainly hope not) and I don’t regret that we got it fixed, but I just can’t shake the thought of that beautiful watch sitting in a box when it had been on his wrist for so long. He could be making more memories with it now. A Rolex like that with such a cool story is meant to be worn and loved and used in the course of a life well lived…just like it had been for over two decades.

At the end of the day, it’s his watch and I should be glad that he fearlessly wore it for as long as he did and respect that he continues to enjoy it in his own way and on his own terms. Maybe it’s not about getting him to love his Rolex again. Maybe it’s about me finally embracing the way he now chooses to remember and cherish the journey and all the life experiences and adventures he’s had with it over the years. Perhaps I’ll convince him to get it out next time I’m over and he can share more life stories with me. I would like that very much.

If you made it all the way to the end, thank you.

[Setarip]

Originally Posted by schoolboy

Have you considered buying your dad the Datejust and a watch winder?

He could put the winder by the bed, and put the watch in there at night.

In the morning he just puts in back on his wrist and repeat.


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Thanks Jesus - at 90, his life has become “simplified” down to just the basics of eating, sleeping, watching the news, periodically checking his email and voraciously reading 5-6 books at a time (intermittent napping ;-) I like the watch winder idea, but not sure he’d follow that routine.

I’ve toyed with the idea of an Oysterquartz DD in good shape. I’ve mentioned this in previous posts, but my dad is the one who introduced me to the appreciation, might I say, love of Swiss watches (watches of any kind really)...taking me into Bucherer in Geneva when I was 10.

[psv]

Job well done. Thanks for sharing.

[schoolboy]

Originally Posted by Setarip

Thanks Jesus - at 90, his life has become “simplified” down to just the basics of eating, sleeping, watching the news, periodically checking his email and voraciously reading 5-6 books at a time (intermittent napping ;-) I like the watch winder idea, but not sure he’d follow that routine.



I’ve toyed with the idea of an Oysterquartz DD in good shape. I’ve mentioned this in previous posts, but my dad is the one who introduced me to the appreciation, might I say, love of Swiss watches (watches of any kind really)...taking me into Bucherer in Geneva when I was 10.

I enjoy reading as well! Alright, I just wanted to share that idea. But yes, an oysterquartz might do it!

[escobar144]

gotta get some photos!

[bobbyandy]

Late Late update to 2020 post as I now have the rest of the story and a pic (if I can upload it). Sorry if I should have just started a new thread and attached a link to the original story.

Dennis was on the city SWAT team and bomb squad and he hand carried a number of unstable/volatile gas cylinders away from a densely populated urban area to a place where they could be safely detonated. The city was grateful and the local “Hundred Club” inducted him as a member. He also got a medal of valor from the city. As I understand, the first inductee from a group would get a Rolex and subsequent inductees from the same organization would get a Tag Heuer.

After he wore the watch for 20 years and then put it away when it no longer kept good time, he never wore it again even after I had it serviced. He was grateful but it never saw his wrist again until I snapped this pic a couple days ago.

He now has dementia and his memories of the watch and adventures with it have mostly faded away. I’m glad he shared the stories of the watch when he did so I can cherish them. Thanks for reading this long overdue update. I just wanted some closure with it.

[bobbyandy]

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[DoctorsOrders]

Originally Posted by JParm

What a great gesture - I think you did an amazing thing, and I'm sure your father-in-law feels the same way.

Watches help to create bonds, and maybe talking Rolex will help to get him wearing it again.

Great advice!

[MrGoat]

Damn OP, I’m sorry to hear about your FIL’s dementia and current state. Glad you got him to at least wear it so a wrist shot could be taken and you pried the stories out of him before he forgot them.

Cheers to Dennis and a watch both living well lived lives together.


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[brandrea]

Thank you for the update. Dementia is just so tough to deal with, whether it be the person suffering from it, or the family and friends.

[Doug5551]

Absolutely epic.

I read it all.

I recently shared a pic of my very modest watch collection with 200 of my motorcycle friends.

One of my friends is a prosperous retired attorney.

She was inspired by my pic, and posted a pic of her watch that she has worn every day for 22 years.

She earned the special commemorative watch volunteering at the Salt Lake City Olympics.

It was a quartz Pulsar/Seiko with a special dial.

I looked it up on EBay and they sell for $30 commonly.

But she earned hers by her efforts, like the man in your story. And it means the world to her.

[worldfamoussam]

Originally Posted by bobbyandy

Late Late update to 2020 post as I now have the rest of the story and a pic (if I can upload it). Sorry if I should have just started a new thread and attached a link to the original story.

Dennis was on the city SWAT team and bomb squad and he hand carried a number of unstable/volatile gas cylinders away from a densely populated urban area to a place where they could be safely detonated. The city was grateful and the local “Hundred Club” inducted him as a member. He also got a medal of valor from the city. As I understand, the first inductee from a group would get a Rolex and subsequent inductees from the same organization would get a Tag Heuer.

After he wore the watch for 20 years and then put it away when it no longer kept good time, he never wore it again even after I had it serviced. He was grateful but it never saw his wrist again until I snapped this pic a couple days ago.

He now has dementia and his memories of the watch and adventures with it have mostly faded away. I’m glad he shared the stories of the watch when he did so I can cherish them. Thanks for reading this long overdue update. I just wanted some closure with it.

It was a really kind and loving gesture that I am sure he really appreciated while he was able to. Thanks for sharing with all of us and wishing you a peaceful and joyous holiday season!

[rolph]

What a fantastic story about your wife’s dad and his Rolex, The fact that it was a gift for something heroic makes it even more special.

[JimSnyder]

Truly great and moving story. Thank you for sharing it with us: