ROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEX

padi56 · 16 October 2012, 08:29 PM

.
If men wrote the agony aunt columns in Cosmopolitan - they'd probably read like this...

Dear Padi:
Q: My husband wants to experience three-in-a-bed sex with me and my sister.

A: Your husband is clearly devoted to you. He cannot get enough of you, so he goes for the next best thing - your sister. Far from being an issue, this will bring all of the family together. Why not get some female cousins involved as well? If you are still apprehensive, then just let him go with your sister and female relatives, buy him a nice, expensive present, and cook him a nice meal and don't ever mention this aspect of his behaviour to him again.

Dear Padi:
Q: My husband continually asks me to perform oral sex with him.

A:You must do it,sp#rm is not only great tasting, but has only 10 calories a spoonful. It is nutritious and helps you to keep your figure and gives a great glow to the skin. It's interesting that only a man should know this. Obviously his offer for you to perform oral sex with him is totally selfless. Oral sex is extremely painful for a man. This shows he loves you. Best thing to do is to thank him afterwards and show him you appreciate this by buying him a that,very expensive watch,then cook him a nice meal.

Dear Padi:
Q: My husband has too many nights out with the boys.

A: This is perfectly natural behaviour - and it should be encouraged. The man is a hunter and he needs to prove his prowess with other men. Far from being pleasurable, a night out with the boys is usually a stressful affair, and to get back to you is a relief for your partner. Just look back at how emotional and happy the man is when he returns to his stable home. Best thing to do is to buy him a nice,very expensive present, and cook him a nice meal and don't mention this aspect of his behaviour.

Dear Padi:
Q: My husband doesn't know where my clitoris is.

A: Your clitoris is of no concern to your husband, as it can be very painful for a man to try and find it. If you must mess with it, do it in your own time and get your sister and/or best friend involved. To help with the family budget, you should videotape yourselves while doing this and then sell it at flea markets (your husband will be of great assistance here). To ease your selfish guilt, buy your man a nice expensive present like a new set of golf clubs, and cook him a delicious meal.

Dear Padi:
Q: My husband is uninterested in fore play.

A: Fore play to a man is very hurtful. If you try and force him into it it would only mean that you do not love your man as much as you should - he'd have to work very hard and long to get you in the mood. Unless you can get your sister and/or best friend involved in this, I strongly recommend that you abandon all wishes in this area, and make it up to him by buying a nice expensive Rolex watch present,and by cooking him his favourite meal.

Dear Padi:
Q: My husband has never given me an orgasm.

A: The female orgasm is a myth. It is an unrealistic concept being fostered by militant, man-hating, loony, left wing, boiler suited feminists in an attempt to destroy the family unit. Don't mention it again to him and show your love to him by buying a nice expensive present....
and don't forget to cook him a delicious meal,and wash his socks.

FeelingTheBlues · 16 October 2012, 09:11 PM

The things you learn on TRF...it's just beyond expectation!

AH0RSEY · 16 October 2012, 09:32 PM

Dear Padi,

My husband is spending all the family money on watches, we can't feed the kids and the mortgage is in arrears....oh what should I do!!!!

bewithabob · 17 October 2012, 03:09 AM

I wonder if this advice comes with a box and papers!

padi56 · 17 October 2012, 03:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AH0RSEY

Dear Padi,

My husband is spending all the family money on watches, we can't feed the kids and the mortgage is in arrears....oh what should I do!!!!

You should sell the watches then find a better husband.

Quote:

Originally Posted by bewithabob

I wonder if this advice comes with a box and papers!

My advice is fully certified and don't need any extra packaging.

Brushpup · 17 October 2012, 04:07 AM

Peter, let me know when you start there. I will be taking up a subscription as soon as you do.

Art 1 · 17 October 2012, 09:01 AM

The Joker · 18 October 2012, 10:09 AM

Glenn422 · 18 October 2012, 08:21 PM

Not sure if I agree on the clitoris part

But i sure do agree with the others especially the "expensive watch / rolex" part

77T · 21 October 2012, 11:35 PM

brkanand · 21 October 2012, 11:41 PM

eric23 · 22 October 2012, 02:24 AM

16 October 2012, 08:29 PM	#1
padi56 "TRF" Life Patron Join Date: Jun 2005 Real Name: Peter Location: Llanfairpwllgwyng Watch: ing you. Posts: 53,063	Agony Aunts . If men wrote the agony aunt columns in Cosmopolitan - they'd probably read like this... Dear Padi: Q: My husband wants to experience three-in-a-bed sex with me and my sister. A: Your husband is clearly devoted to you. He cannot get enough of you, so he goes for the next best thing - your sister. Far from being an issue, this will bring all of the family together. Why not get some female cousins involved as well? If you are still apprehensive, then just let him go with your sister and female relatives, buy him a nice, expensive present, and cook him a nice meal and don't ever mention this aspect of his behaviour to him again. Dear Padi: Q: My husband continually asks me to perform oral sex with him. A:You must do it,sp#rm is not only great tasting, but has only 10 calories a spoonful. It is nutritious and helps you to keep your figure and gives a great glow to the skin. It's interesting that only a man should know this. Obviously his offer for you to perform oral sex with him is totally selfless. Oral sex is extremely painful for a man. This shows he loves you. Best thing to do is to thank him afterwards and show him you appreciate this by buying him a that,very expensive watch,then cook him a nice meal. Dear Padi: Q: My husband has too many nights out with the boys. A: This is perfectly natural behaviour - and it should be encouraged. The man is a hunter and he needs to prove his prowess with other men. Far from being pleasurable, a night out with the boys is usually a stressful affair, and to get back to you is a relief for your partner. Just look back at how emotional and happy the man is when he returns to his stable home. Best thing to do is to buy him a nice,very expensive present, and cook him a nice meal and don't mention this aspect of his behaviour. Dear Padi: Q: My husband doesn't know where my clitoris is. A: Your clitoris is of no concern to your husband, as it can be very painful for a man to try and find it. If you must mess with it, do it in your own time and get your sister and/or best friend involved. To help with the family budget, you should videotape yourselves while doing this and then sell it at flea markets (your husband will be of great assistance here). To ease your selfish guilt, buy your man a nice expensive present like a new set of golf clubs, and cook him a delicious meal. Dear Padi: Q: My husband is uninterested in fore play. A: Fore play to a man is very hurtful. If you try and force him into it it would only mean that you do not love your man as much as you should - he'd have to work very hard and long to get you in the mood. Unless you can get your sister and/or best friend involved in this, I strongly recommend that you abandon all wishes in this area, and make it up to him by buying a nice expensive Rolex watch present,and by cooking him his favourite meal. Dear Padi: Q: My husband has never given me an orgasm. A: The female orgasm is a myth. It is an unrealistic concept being fostered by militant, man-hating, loony, left wing, boiler suited feminists in an attempt to destroy the family unit. Don't mention it again to him and show your love to him by buying a nice expensive present.... and don't forget to cook him a delicious meal,and wash his socks. __________________ ICom Pro3 All posts are my own opinion and my opinion only. "The clock of life is wound but once, and no man has the power to tell just when the hands will stop. Now is the only time you actually own the time, Place no faith in time, for the clock may soon be still for ever." Good Judgement comes from experience,experience comes from Bad Judgement,.Buy quality, cry once; buy cheap, cry again and again. www.mc0yad.club Second in command CEO and left handed watch winder

16 October 2012, 09:11 PM	#2
FeelingTheBlues "TRF" Member Join Date: Sep 2011 Real Name: Carl Location: Always moving Watch: If you wish... Posts: 22,039	The things you learn on TRF...it's just beyond expectation! __________________ Mon corps c'est un pays en guerre sur l'point d'finir, Le général de l'armée de terre s'attend au pire, J'ai faim, j'ai frette, je suis trop faible pour me lever debout, On va hisser le drapeau blanc un point c'est tout. - André Fortin

16 October 2012, 09:32 PM	#3
AH0RSEY "TRF" Member Join Date: Jul 2012 Real Name: Steve Location: Harrogate Watch: OUT !!!! Posts: 829	Dear Padi, My husband is spending all the family money on watches, we can't feed the kids and the mortgage is in arrears....oh what should I do!!!! __________________ Current rotation; AP15500ST grey, White Daytona 116500, WG Black/Red Daytona 116509, White and Black EXP 42, GMT2C.... too many previous it makes my head hurt thinking about them.

17 October 2012, 03:09 AM	#4
bewithabob "TRF" Member Join Date: Jan 2008 Real Name: Bob Location: Dallas, Texas Watch: Daytona Meteorite Posts: 3,417	I wonder if this advice comes with a box and papers! __________________ meteor flying to Earth onto my wrist... 116509 Daytona Meteorite, 116520 Daytona Black, 116710 GMTIIC, 16013 DATEJUST, CARTIER SANTOS 100 W20090X8, IWC Big Pilot, IWC Top Gun "Everything works out in the end. If it hasn't worked out, it's not the end."

17 October 2012, 04:07 AM	#6
Brushpup "TRF" Member Join Date: Jun 2007 Real Name: Patrick Location: Texas Watch: what I'm wearing Posts: 5,943	Peter, let me know when you start there. I will be taking up a subscription as soon as you do. __________________ *TRFs "AFTER DARK" Bar & NightClub Patron-Founding Member* PClub # 10 74,592 The safest place for your watch is on your wrist.

17 October 2012, 09:01 AM	#7
Art 1 Banned Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Florida, Canada Watch: Rol/Seik/Tud/Omega Posts: 30,244

18 October 2012, 10:09 AM	#8
The Joker "TRF" Member Join Date: Sep 2010 Location: Gotham Posts: 9,641

18 October 2012, 08:21 PM	#9
Glenn422 "TRF" Member Join Date: Sep 2012 Location: TRF Posts: 721	Not sure if I agree on the clitoris part But i sure do agree with the others especially the "expensive watch / rolex" part

21 October 2012, 11:35 PM	#10
77T 2024 SubLV41 Pledge Member Join Date: Dec 2010 Real Name: PaulG Location: Georgia Posts: 42,017	__________________ Does anyone really know what time it is?

21 October 2012, 11:41 PM	#11
brkanand 2024 Pledge Member Join Date: Jul 2009 Real Name: DrK Location: India Watch: 4=YMDaytonaGMTHulk Posts: 7,052

22 October 2012, 02:24 AM	#12
eric23 "TRF" Member Join Date: Apr 2008 Real Name: Eric Location: Calgary Posts: 9,595

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