The Rolex Forums   The Rolex Watch

ROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEX


Go Back   Rolex Forums - Rolex Forum > General Topics > Jokes & Cartoons

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 20 October 2012, 08:21 PM   #1
padi56
"TRF" Life Patron
 
padi56's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Real Name: Peter
Location: Llanfairpwllgwyng
Watch: ing you.
Posts: 53,063
The Trouser Snake.

(Trouser Snake)

NAME: "Expecteria Trouserius" (Trouser Snake)

LOCATION: Throughout the world

DESCRIPTION: Varying from pink to black. Fang-less, with a highly venomous spit. Size varies from 3 to 12 inches, depending on its mood and subspecies.

SYMPTOMS: This snake attacks, mainly women, in the lower front abdomen, resulting in an inconspicuous bump. Then, a severe swelling, followed by excruciating pain after nine months. The attack is not usually fatal. However, it has been known to attack men in the rear lower abdomen, which may result in an incurable disease and possible death.

HABITAT: Usually found in bedrooms, but has been known to appear in the most unusual places.

ANTIDOTE: Various types of vaccine available for women. However, once the venom is injected into the body, only drastic measures will ensure complete recovery. There is no known antidote for men.

WHAT TO DO WHEN ATTACKED:

TOURNIQUET: Do not apply a tourniquet, as the venom is too deep in the body to be affected.

CUTTING THE WOUND: This would be completely unnecessary and ineffective as the bleeding will stop after a few weeks anyhow.

SUCKING THE WOUND: This method is the most popular with the victim, but so far has not been reported to have led to any success.

MILKING THE SNAKE:

1. Place 4 fingers of the right hand around the neck of the reptile, with the thumb in the front.

2. Grip firmly and move the hand in an upward and downward motion.

3. This will result in the snake becoming highly aggressive and start spitting.

4. The time taken for this milking process depends entirely on the milker and the last time the snake attacked.

5. Once milked, the snake should be harmless for about 20 minutes.

CONCLUSION: This snake, although it is very aggressive and active, is not necessarily a vermin and treated with the right respect, makes a wonderful pet.
__________________
__________________

ICom Pro3

All posts are my own opinion and my opinion only.

"The clock of life is wound but once, and no man has the power to tell just when the hands will stop. Now is the only time you actually own the time, Place no faith in time, for the clock may soon be still for ever."
Good Judgement comes from experience,experience comes from Bad Judgement,.Buy quality, cry once; buy cheap, cry again and again.

www.mc0yad.club

Second in command CEO and left handed watch winder
padi56 is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 20 October 2012, 09:13 PM   #2
Art 1
Banned
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Florida, Canada
Watch: Rol/Seik/Tud/Omega
Posts: 30,244
Art 1 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 20 October 2012, 10:26 PM   #3
RRGHOST1
"TRF" Member
 
RRGHOST1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2009
Real Name: luke standing
Location: england
Watch: Rolex TT SubC Blue
Posts: 3,997
Ha ha !
__________________
RRGHOST1
RRGHOST1 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 21 October 2012, 11:00 PM   #4
77T
2024 SubLV41 Pledge Member
 
77T's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Real Name: PaulG
Location: Georgia
Posts: 42,017
__________________


Does anyone really know what time it is?
77T is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 22 October 2012, 02:49 AM   #5
eric23
"TRF" Member
 
eric23's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Real Name: Eric
Location: Calgary
Posts: 9,595
eric23 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 25 October 2012, 04:50 PM   #6
Glenn422
"TRF" Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: TRF
Posts: 721
Glenn422 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 26 October 2012, 05:19 AM   #7
TSW
"TRF" Member
 
TSW's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Real Name: TSW
Location: Le Brassus
Watch: Rolex & AP's
Posts: 27,449
:)
__________________

AP Owners Club
IG @swiss.watch.connection
TSW is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 26 October 2012, 10:49 AM   #8
Bangel
"TRF" Member
 
Bangel's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Australia
Watch: 116610LN
Posts: 15,802
Bangel is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Wrist Aficionado

My Watch LLC

WatchesOff5th

DavidSW Watches

Takuya Watches

OCWatches


*Banners Of The Month*
This space is provided to horological resources.





Copyright ©2004-2024, The Rolex Forums. All Rights Reserved.

ROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEX

Rolex is a registered trademark of ROLEX USA. The Rolex Forums is not affiliated with ROLEX USA in any way.