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Old 13 December 2013, 12:00 AM   #1
Alcan
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Alcan's Discount Rolex Service

With Christmas right around the corner, I've decided to supplement my income with a part-time career as a watchmaker. Due to underwhelming demand for my Rolex watch services the last time I posted them, I'm now also providing overhauls for other fine watches such as Patek Phillipe and Audemars Piguet. I'm quite sure no other watchmakers will be able to match my unique level of service. All I need now are some exquisite watches to work on.


First, to undo those darned stubborn caseback I bought the Acme OneSizeFitzall Caseback Whack-a-Matic:






It comes with several adaptors to handle different case configurations.






After disassembly, I thoroughly clean all those delicate internal components:










I have the Larry Tools patented Watch Wash-a-Matic to gently clean the case and bracelet. This machine is also used to fully wind automatic watches in 3 nanoseconds prior to return shipping:






You can be assured of receiving quality service, as I've been thoroughly trained by the master used parts pickers/watchmakers here at Hardly Used Auto Parts & Watchmaking School. They are also my source of almost factory authorized parts.






During reassembly, only the highest quality specialized lubricants will be used at all critical wear points.










After reassembly I check and verify the timing with my master chronometer, much more accurate that COSC testing.






I also use my own secret, patented refinishing process. I think you'll agree that the results are quite remarkable.






After completion, your treasured timepiece will be shipped back using only the most reliable, expedient and secure method. All of the spare bits I find inside during the overhaul will be shipped by separate carrier at the same time.






I'm now also offering a new service, unique to the watchmaking industry. Worried about shock damage from wearing your Rolex while golfing, your Audemars Piguet while playing polo, or your Patek Phillipe during bar fights? Worry no more, I've perfected the Kif/Incablock shock protection test procedure. As a disclaimer though, I should point out that not all watches pass the test.












If you're concerned about your watch getting lost in the mail and prefer to carry your treasured timepiece in for service, I have two service locations for your convenience.









As you can see, I have endorsements from renowned international experts who are unanimous in their opinion of my unique services.








Some images courtesy of Larry and Jocke. The rest I shamelessly swiped from unknown internet entities.
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Old 13 December 2013, 12:04 AM   #2
ViperB
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Lol, where do I ship my Rolex to? What's the turn around time?
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Old 13 December 2013, 12:08 AM   #3
MonBK
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Great post Al, expect tons of business.
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Old 13 December 2013, 12:08 AM   #4
subtona
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Ill be sending my collection in for service straight away, do you offer multiple watch discount?
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Old 13 December 2013, 12:12 AM   #5
kilyung
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Obviously you trained under Jocke.
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Old 13 December 2013, 01:06 AM   #6
phils
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LOL. Very cleverly done.
I remember the SD pic. The guy was in a motorcycle accident.
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Old 13 December 2013, 01:24 AM   #7
MitchSteel
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Quote:
Obviously you trained under Jocke.
Clearly
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Old 13 December 2013, 01:36 AM   #8
SLS
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What's your warranty? nicely done Al
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Old 13 December 2013, 02:33 AM   #9
Speedbird-1
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Had any problems with ceramic bezels?
Do you do cyclops removal?
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Old 13 December 2013, 02:43 AM   #10
Dr. Robert
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Any discounts for TRFers????
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Old 13 December 2013, 02:55 AM   #11
Chris B
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Bravo Al
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Old 13 December 2013, 04:48 AM   #12
Cc1966
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I have a coupon!!!!
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Old 13 December 2013, 07:26 AM   #13
scranger
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Would have made a good April 1st post I remember seeing the "Genuine Fake Watches" sign, or one like it, at Ephesus a few years ago.
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Old 13 December 2013, 07:35 AM   #14
Amer
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LMAO....I think you are going to piss off a bunch of watch repair folks here since you are using the latest, modern repair tools.



Great post
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Old 13 December 2013, 07:38 AM   #15
up2nogood
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kilyung View Post
Obviously you trained under Jocke.
You beat me to saying that!
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Old 13 December 2013, 07:45 AM   #16
Frosty
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Old 13 December 2013, 07:54 AM   #17
crowncollection
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what is the typical turnaround period ? i am sure you will be inundated with business
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Old 13 December 2013, 08:16 AM   #18
Presa canary
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Agh... Your services obviously make the outside and inside beautiful! But will I be able to shower with my 16570 on?
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Old 13 December 2013, 08:21 AM   #19
East Bay Rider
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HA! Excellent.
I was laughing out loud the entire time.
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Old 13 December 2013, 08:54 AM   #20
threemonkeys
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Am I the only one waiting for Jocke's pic showcasing his own watchmaking skills?
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Old 13 December 2013, 09:09 AM   #21
edavila
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Just picked up my first Rolex yesterday but I'll consider you for business in about 3-5 years from now. Hopefully your price for servicing won't go skyrocketing by then!
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Old 13 December 2013, 09:12 AM   #22
Cru Jones
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Old 13 December 2013, 12:00 PM   #23
B737boss
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I especially like your shipping service!
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Old 13 December 2013, 12:06 PM   #24
madgoncalves
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Lmao, very we'll done.
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Old 13 December 2013, 12:18 PM   #25
Sean.UK
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Are any of your tools for sale?
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Old 13 December 2013, 12:50 PM   #26
hdrazor251
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Maybe you can partner with Carl
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Old 13 December 2013, 01:36 PM   #27
Laszlo
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Hilarious!
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Old 13 December 2013, 02:53 PM   #28
swils8610
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I wish you worked on JLC and Omega!


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Old 13 December 2013, 03:09 PM   #29
Tudor66
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Do you accept paypal...?
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Old 13 December 2013, 03:18 PM   #30
waQstar
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That was awesome, cleverly done..
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