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18 February 2012, 04:20 AM | #31 |
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Nice pics!
Where in Finland does your brothers live?
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18 February 2012, 04:45 AM | #32 | |
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Now, get back to that part about beautiul women throwing themselves at you because you're a Westerner.... Do you need an assistant over there? |
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18 February 2012, 05:26 AM | #33 |
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Fascinating story.Thanks for sharing.I think just doing that took guts.I dont want to give advice any way,but I think you will find middle ground where everybody's happy. All the best !!
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18 February 2012, 05:54 AM | #34 |
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Helsinki. I've only met one of them and he is a contract chef so you may have dined at a restaurant that he has worked at. He is actually planning to come visit me this year and maybe one day I will get to visit Finland.
Take a number Paul. It's funny how many people want to visit me if I end up living over there. |
18 February 2012, 10:00 AM | #35 |
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Good luck in your decision! Great photos and story!
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18 February 2012, 10:14 AM | #36 |
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Vu I am excited for you that you found family that you never knew they existed and the prospect of spending time with them is something special.
I wish you the very best whatever you decide and things in life happen for a reason and listen to your heart and spend time with the people you missed out getting to know while growing up and living on this earth. I had missed out getting to know my uncles, my untie and their kids from my fathers side and met them in my mid 30s when by chance I ran into one of them in Greece. They lived all their lives in Sweden and in parts in Greece and never had seen them as my father had a beef with his brothers and sister. I spend around 6 months in Sweden getting to know some of them, uncle, untie, cousins wives and their children and it was the best thing I ever done and hence why I feel your trip back home is an experience that is priceless so go for it! PM me if there is anything I can help with. |
18 February 2012, 04:12 PM | #37 |
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Do what you do brother and I'm sure it'll work out. I love the picture with the snake/frog in the bottle. It's alcohol, right?
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18 February 2012, 06:12 PM | #38 | |
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Same city as I then. I'm in the restaurant business too, so I might very well have eaten at the restaurant.
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18 February 2012, 06:30 PM | #39 |
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wow overwhelming story! You can surely write a book or a movie on your life events!
You are truly blessed that you were looked after by your step dad in times of need. I would wish you good luck and happiness, it seems your father really loves you and wishes to make up on the time you were away. Money shouldn't be important.
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19 February 2012, 01:50 AM | #40 | |
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Love flows through a marriage that lives up to mutual responsibility. “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it” Ephesians 5:25 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church — for we are members of His body. For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. This is a profound mystery-but I am talking about christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. (Ephesians 5:25-33) |
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19 February 2012, 02:02 AM | #41 | |
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He didn't ask for opinions, never mind a sermon.
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..33 |
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19 February 2012, 02:08 AM | #42 |
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One of the most thought provoking TRF threads I've read in awhile... Thanks for sharing your story with us Vu... I am sure it will work out for the best!
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19 February 2012, 02:10 AM | #43 |
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Here's the million dollar question and I'm sorry if its already been asked and answered because I didn't read everything.
What type of business in your bio. father in? If you dont know then you answered my question about the whole thing and you have your answer. |
19 February 2012, 02:18 AM | #44 |
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I understand that. However, I am trying to keep him from making a mistake, that will effect his life tremendously. Making these kinds of decisions have serious implications that are far reaching. I am not here to say what people want to hear.
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19 February 2012, 03:14 AM | #45 | |
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As for my statement, I tend to speak with open endings since I believe the only thing guarantee in life is death. I can say that I possibly may be homeless tomorrow. That doesn't mean I want to be homeless or that it will happen, but the possibility still exists. I've been married for twelve years and have been faithful. However, that is no guarantee that the marriage will last forever; things can happen on either side. I'm sure that you understand that. |
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19 February 2012, 03:29 AM | #46 |
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You may need to refresh your memory about the TRF forum rules regarding religious posts, and respecting the views of others. Not everyone believes the way you do, and they take their own beliefs just as seriously as you take yours.
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19 February 2012, 04:16 AM | #47 | |
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Sometimes an OP will ask for people's opinions. Even then, we keep the gods out of the thread.
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..33 |
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19 February 2012, 04:43 AM | #48 |
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Vu, the story of you meeting biological father is touching. Thank you for sharing.
The life changing decision you are facing is also heart wrenching. Great to hear that you can discuss with wife openly on this topic and got her support. About 17 years ago, I did a business venture in Hong Kong/China while family stayed in Canada. Like many things in life, there were good and bad during those 4 years. Nonetheless no regrets. I wish you the best which ever direction you take.
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19 February 2012, 05:29 AM | #49 | |
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If i get kicked off the forum then so be it, the advice I give is good advice, and I really do it with the best of intentions, not to bible thump him. "all will be laid naked and bare, before the one whom they must render an account." |
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19 February 2012, 05:40 AM | #50 | |
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You were warned by a moderator and still continued. You suggested your banning and gave us no choice in the end.
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19 February 2012, 05:57 AM | #51 |
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Dalip - simple thanks!
Vu - what a stirring set of circumstances - your head must still be swimming in the endless possibilities. I hope for the best for you and the families - and please let us know how you choose. I am always amazed at the diverse lives our members have.
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19 February 2012, 10:19 AM | #52 |
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Personally I wouldn't leave a wife behind. And I'm not ever married.
Good luck Vu with whatever you choose. |
19 February 2012, 02:20 PM | #53 | |
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x 2! |
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20 February 2012, 04:10 AM | #54 | |
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20 February 2012, 01:14 PM | #55 |
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I spoke to my dad tonight and he suggested skipping the three month visit and jump to the two year. The pro of this is that it would reduce the length of time I am overseas. The con is that I don't have the grace period to decide if this is right for me. Of course, in the back of my head I want to do this so I'm not sure if I really need a grace period.
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20 February 2012, 02:39 PM | #56 |
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Vu, sounds like you want to do it and that your wife is cool with it.
Do it! |
21 February 2012, 08:14 AM | #57 |
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What a dilemma! And thank you for sharing your story.
I have nothing constructive to add to your saga other than to encourage you to think with your mind rather than your heart in this difficult decision. It appears obvious what you have your heart set on and are aware of the inherent risks to your personal and professional life. Good luck in whatever you decide: I came to the USA from neighboring Cambodia, and can only imagine how difficult it may be for you to acclimate to your new environment should you choose to proceed. |
21 February 2012, 08:21 AM | #58 | |
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When do we leave!?!?!? It won't take me long to pack.... Boss |
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21 February 2012, 08:28 AM | #59 | ||
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And having read that your wife is non-Viet, it's a good thing she's going to stay stateside. Otherwise, she'll be clamped to your side constantly to keep the ladies away.
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21 February 2012, 08:29 AM | #60 |
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I would be somewhat troubled by how quickly this has accelerated now (no shorter trial run...). With such a dramatic life decision why the seeming insistence on doing it so quickly? That being said, I've never walked a mile in your shoes so I don't pretend to know what is right for you. Good luck
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