Cat allergies- How do you cope?

[HL65]

For me find a new fiancé as I am deathly allergic to cats so we would have not been together from the start. Sorry just being honest and best of luck!

[MonBK]

Originally Posted by HL65

For me find a new fiancé as I am deathly allergic to cats so we would have not been together from the start. Sorry just being honest and best of luck!

The best is of course to find a fiance who's allergic to Rolex!!

[HL65]

Originally Posted by MonBK

The best is of course to find a fiance who's allergic to Rolex!!

[Shem]

I hope those recommending leaving the door open or otherwise quickly "getting rid" of the cats are joking. I sense a lot of cat haters here.

If you do decide to rehome the cats, which again I do not recommend, make sure you work with a local shelter (who does at least a minimal screening on potential adopters) and foster them yourself. Basically, this allows the cats to stay in your home as fosters (rather than burdening the shelter or other fosters) and gives the cats the most comfortable environment (their own home) until they are adopted. It's a bit of work on your part in that you have to continue living with the cats for a time and do the necessary work to show the cats to prospective owners, but this is a very small price to pay for ensuring that the cats make a safe transition (though you can't avoid it being an extremely stressful one for the cats (and for your wife) once they do get adopted).

Why do people think they can just "get rid of" living beings in their care when they become unwanted or a hassle? It's not like throwing out a toy when it outlives its novelty. Any change in territory is a very big stress on a cat.

Aside from the ethical implications of putting the cats through the torment of rehoming, it's also questionable whether a marriage should start with the husband making his wife get rid of her beloved pets, particularly without taking any steps to try and make it work. In reality, this is one of the smallest sacrifices you're likely to make in your marriage.

I think there's a bit heavy bias against using allergy medicine here, too...perhaps others have had bad experiences with certain products. But there are plenty of options if you talk to your allergist -- it's not limited to the 3 you've heard of -- and I'm sure you can find ones that work for you without intolerable side effects.

I personally would rather take a sensible allergy medication for the rest of my life than give up my wife or force her to part with her loved ones...and you may not even have to do that, depending on how your experiences proceed.

[Thatguy]

Originally Posted by Shem

I hope those recommending leaving the door open or otherwise quickly "getting rid" of the cats are joking. I sense a lot of cat haters here.

If you do decide to rehome the cats, which again I do not recommend, make sure you work with a local shelter (who does at least a minimal screening on potential adopters) and foster them yourself. Basically, this allows the cats to stay in your home as fosters (rather than burdening the shelter or other fosters) and gives the cats the most comfortable environment (their own home) until they are adopted. It's a bit of work on your part in that you have to continue living with the cats for a time and do the necessary work to show the cats to prospective owners, but this is a very small price to pay for ensuring that the cats make a safe transition (though you can't avoid it being an extremely stressful one for the cats (and for your wife) once they do get adopted).

Why do people think they can just "get rid of" living beings in their care when they become unwanted or a hassle? It's not like throwing out a toy when it outlives its novelty. Any change in territory is a very big stress on a cat.

Aside from the ethical implications of putting the cats through the torment of rehoming, it's also questionable whether a marriage should start with the husband making his wife get rid of her beloved pets, particularly without taking any steps to try and make it work. In reality, this is one of the smallest sacrifices you're likely to make in your marriage.

I think there's a bit heavy bias against using allergy medicine here, too...perhaps others have had bad experiences with certain products. But there are plenty of options if you talk to your allergist -- it's not limited to the 3 you've heard of -- and I'm sure you can find ones that work for you without intolerable side effects.

I personally would rather take a sensible allergy medication for the rest of my life than give up my wife or force her to part with her loved ones...and you may not even have to do that, depending on how your experiences proceed.

Well said!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Headshrinker]

One reason the New Years party is at our house this year. I can't last longer than a hour at our neighbors house without having difficulty breathing.

[T. Ferguson]

Originally Posted by MonBK

The best is of course to find a fiance who's allergic to Rolex!!

Not so sure I like this idea. Aren't we talking about having to get rid of something because your mate is allergic to it?

[bp1000]

I'm the same with cats, I like them and pet my neighbours occasionally and sometimes suffers especially if it comes in the house. Those few hours of itchy eyes, dry throat and running nose I can deal with for the brief encounters but continuously no way.

I think you guys need a amicable talk in the new year. surely she knows and will understand

[colpol]

the one thing you haven't said is - what's your fiancés take on this ?

Surely she must know of your situation ?

Personally - If it hadn't been raised\ resolved to your satisfaction - I wouldn't be going anywhere. Its one thing staying over for a couple of nights at a time - another moving in full time.

[towernick]

Originally Posted by colpol

the one thing you haven't said is - what's your fiancés take on this ?

Surely she must know of your situation ?

Personally - If it hadn't been raised\ resolved to your satisfaction - I wouldn't be going anywhere. Its one thing staying over for a couple of nights at a time - another moving in full time.

Well, her take is said cats have been with her a long time and are "family". I grew up with dogs so in reality I understand that. She also fully aware of the situation and understands keeping them may not be an option.

We're expecting in June so not moving in isn't an option, also, we've been dating over two years, I'm 30, she's 35, it's time for us to live together.

[Wllnv19]

Originally Posted by towernick

Well, her take is said cats have been with her a long time and are "family". I grew up with dogs so in reality I understand that. She also fully aware of the situation and understands keeping them may not be an option.

We're expecting in June so not moving in isn't an option, also, we've been dating over two years, I'm 30, she's 35, it's time for us to live together.

Good luck....hope it all works out

[superdog]

Originally Posted by azguy

Seriously, you need to re-evaluate the whole situation, cat dander is everywhere, there's no way you can live there and you can't live on Claritin forever

This is very accurate.

I'm extremely allergic. And there is absolutely no solution.

If I were moving in with two cats, I'd be dead within two nights.

In my single days, I slept out with a new lady friend that had a cat. I've still barely recovered. And another time, at another house, I woke up with swollen lips. My Dr told me if ur were my throat id be dead.

You need to revaluate the sutuation. Seriously. Allergies don't just go away.

[superdog]

Originally Posted by Shem

I hope those recommending leaving the door open or otherwise quickly "getting rid" of the cats are joking. I sense a lot of cat haters here.

If you do decide to rehome the cats, which again I do not recommend, make sure you work with a local shelter (who does at least a minimal screening on potential adopters) and foster them yourself. Basically, this allows the cats to stay in your home as fosters (rather than burdening the shelter or other fosters) and gives the cats the most comfortable environment (their own home) until they are adopted. It's a bit of work on your part in that you have to continue living with the cats for a time and do the necessary work to show the cats to prospective owners, but this is a very small price to pay for ensuring that the cats make a safe transition (though you can't avoid it being an extremely stressful one for the cats (and for your wife) once they do get adopted).

Why do people think they can just "get rid of" living beings in their care when they become unwanted or a hassle? It's not like throwing out a toy when it outlives its novelty. Any change in territory is a very big stress on a cat.

Aside from the ethical implications of putting the cats through the torment of rehoming, it's also questionable whether a marriage should start with the husband making his wife get rid of her beloved pets, particularly without taking any steps to try and make it work. In reality, this is one of the smallest sacrifices you're likely to make in your marriage.

I think there's a bit heavy bias against using allergy medicine here, too...perhaps others have had bad experiences with certain products. But there are plenty of options if you talk to your allergist -- it's not limited to the 3 you've heard of -- and I'm sure you can find ones that work for you without intolerable side effects.

I personally would rather take a sensible allergy medication for the rest of my life than give up my wife or force her to part with her loved ones...and you may not even have to do that, depending on how your experiences proceed.

As much as I'm allergic to cats, I happen to agree with this.

I'm a dog guy. I'd never ever get rid of my little guy.

[swils8610]

Step 1-find very heavy blunt object
Step 2-here kitty kitty kitty!
Step 3-heave heavy blunt object above your head
Step 4-well you know!

Just kidding of course!! Good luck!

[One Ping Only]

Dust, pollen and animals are my allergens. They seem to bother me more as I have gotten older, but my wife loves cats and I admit I don't exactly mind them. Generic Claritin and Omnaris work for me.

[anothernewphone]

My family owned a pet store for 25 years. My dad was in the business before I was born, and there was no way to tell how allergic I would be to cats. So, coming from an area of "expertise," I can tell you that if you're really allergic to cats, no amount of vacuuming, hand-washing, or hepa-filtering is going to help if you live with two animals whose dander is out to kill you.

There is no such thing as a hypo-allergenic cat. This is commonly referenced to dogs with hair instead of fur, and cats with short-to-no fur. Cat allergies are triggered by dander, not fur. My sister-in-law has two Devon Rex cats, which have very, very little fur. Her husband does everything he can to prepare the house for Thanksgiving and Christmas dinner parties when allergic family members will be over for a few hours. He spent hundreds on new, fancy air filters for the house, cleaned from top to bottom, and I popped a Zyrtec before heading over. Within an hour, I was sneezing and my eyes were watering. My wife was sneezing and her face was itching. It was time to go. Dine and dash, goodnight all!

Some people can out-grow allergies, but if you're allergic, moving in with her is going to be unlivable. I have rolled around with girls that owned cats, and their clothes made me sneeze, I couldn't imagine living with two of them.

[Shem]

If we are going to bring up expertise, my wife volunteers for an animal shelter and works for a pet boarding facility where she is the cat room manager. She taught me what I know about cats, two of whom are laying on our bed right now, with me. Despite my severe allergies, I'm totally fine because I have adapted to these cats. In someone else's house, I might be in much worse shape.

Everyone has a different experience. Please don't take mine or anyone else's as gospel -- people always overvalue their own experiences. All I recommend is that you feel it out for yourself and not take any rash actions. :) Try the various methods I suggested along with any others that professionals like your allergist suggest, and see what happens.

[Dr.Brian]

There is no way I would voluntarily take those drugs long term. Give it a try, see if it works, but I suspect the cats have to go. That's not cat hating, that's common sense.
If my wife or children were alergic to dogs, the dogs would go to the breed rescue.

[Baco Noir]

Try a program called NAET - https://www.naet.com/. It's worked well for my wife and many of her family members. While it hasn't eliminated them completely, it's lessened it to the point that occasional allergy meds help on the bad days.


Sent from my iPad Air 2 using Tapatalk (so I blame autocorrect for the spellin' errs)

[Baco Noir]

Originally Posted by swils8610

Step 1-find very heavy blunt object
Step 2-here kitty kitty kitty!
Step 3-heave heavy blunt object above your head
Step 4-well you know!

Just kidding of course!! Good luck!

Not even close to being funny.


Sent from my iPad Air 2 using Tapatalk (so I blame autocorrect for the spellin' errs)

[gte217e]

I was in the same situation back in 2009.
Not only was I allergic, I was not familiar with cats at all.

I tried Claritin and Zyrtec.
Claritin worked for me. I bought 800 pills on Amazon for about 15 bucks shipped.
I take one 24hr Claritin pill everyday. The pills are tiny. I take them at the same time everyday; usually in the evening.

I since divorced and the ex took both cats with her; however, I grew so accustomed to cats that I rescued two cats. I love cats now. Crazy stuff.

Anyways, here are my rules:
1. Take pill everyday
2. Don't stick face in fur
3. Lint brush my shirts

I hardly vacuum and I can get pretty close to my cats. The Claritin really works wonders.

[powerfunk]

Originally Posted by anothernewphone

There is no such thing as a hypo-allergenic cat.

Sure there is. No cat is totally allergen- free, but that's not what hypoallergenic means. Dander and saliva can cause allergies, and some cats have less than others; it's not just cats with little-to-no fur, either.

[Andad]

Originally Posted by Shem

I hope those recommending leaving the door open or otherwise quickly "getting rid" of the cats are joking. I sense a lot of cat haters here.

If you do decide to rehome the cats, which again I do not recommend, make sure you work with a local shelter (who does at least a minimal screening on potential adopters) and foster them yourself. Basically, this allows the cats to stay in your home as fosters (rather than burdening the shelter or other fosters) and gives the cats the most comfortable environment (their own home) until they are adopted. It's a bit of work on your part in that you have to continue living with the cats for a time and do the necessary work to show the cats to prospective owners, but this is a very small price to pay for ensuring that the cats make a safe transition (though you can't avoid it being an extremely stressful one for the cats (and for your wife) once they do get adopted).

Why do people think they can just "get rid of" living beings in their care when they become unwanted or a hassle? It's not like throwing out a toy when it outlives its novelty. Any change in territory is a very big stress on a cat.

Aside from the ethical implications of putting the cats through the torment of rehoming, it's also questionable whether a marriage should start with the husband making his wife get rid of her beloved pets, particularly without taking any steps to try and make it work. In reality, this is one of the smallest sacrifices you're likely to make in your marriage.

I think there's a bit heavy bias against using allergy medicine here, too...perhaps others have had bad experiences with certain products. But there are plenty of options if you talk to your allergist -- it's not limited to the 3 you've heard of -- and I'm sure you can find ones that work for you without intolerable side effects.

I personally would rather take a sensible allergy medication for the rest of my life than give up my wife or force her to part with her loved ones...and you may not even have to do that, depending on how your experiences proceed.

A sad post in many ways.

[Andad]

Originally Posted by MonBK

Well, you know why divorces are expensive, right.
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.........because they are worth it.

[clock]

What type of symptoms do you have when you are exposed to a cat? And how long does it usually take before they appear?
If you get asthmatic symptoms, I would avoid living with a cat due to the potential of serious morbidity or even mortality.
Also some allergic people with constant exposure to cats need to be on inhaled steroids and bronchodilators everyday. Even if you tolerate these medications, they can have long term side effects.
If your symptoms are mainly nasal, you might do well on a daily antihistamine and/or a nasal steroid or other class of meds. There's always allergy shots.
You're in a difficult position. But, it can be done. Hopefully there isn't carpet in the house.
Seems like you will move forward with your fiancé and see what happens.
The best of luck.

[Soly20]

If your fiancé prefers the cats over your health, then you need to rethink this whole thing....Just sayin'....You and your health or the cats...

Would you keep the cats if they caused health problems for your fiancé?

[Thatguy]

Originally Posted by Soly20

If your fiancé prefers the cats over your health, then you need to rethink this whole thing....Just sayin'....You and your health or the cats...



Would you keep the cats if they caused health problems for your fiancé?

Interesting. I spoke to my wife regarding this thread and asked what she would have done if I was allergic since she had and still has 2 cats when we started dating.
Her response was that our relationship would not have gotten to the move in stage if I was allergic.


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[Shem]

Originally Posted by Soly20

If your fiancé prefers the cats over your health, then you need to rethink this whole thing....Just sayin'....You and your health or the cats...

Would you keep the cats if they caused health problems for your fiancé?

I totally respect this opinion, and yet at the same time, I personally think it might be a bit over-polarizing...

I expect my wife to be her own person with her own interests. She loves her cats, they're more important to her than any of my hobbies are to me (and she puts up with all of my hobbies and idiosyncrasies). I mean she volunteers with cats and works with cats. I fell in love with someone who happens to love animals. She doesn't "prefer the cats over my health," but I choose to let her pursue her passions and take the necessary steps to prevent incompatibility with them. The same is true with her financial sacrifices for my watch hobby (and my other expensive hobbies).

Now, for all of that, she also loves me -- if it were a very serious health burden, I am sure she would have taken the necessary steps to prevent me from suffering. But it turned out not to be necessary because of my treatment by a well-respected, board-certified allergist (not a watch forum opinion on what allergy medications may or may not do) and my adaptation to our particular cats, in addition to proactive steps to prevent excessive exposure to allergens (as outlined by my posts and others'). This approach has worked for us and for several others who have commented in this thread having experienced exactly the circumstances about which you queried.

It's simply unnecessary to turn this into a black-and-white, "she loves you and gets rid of them or she doesn't," scenario. Like anything else in life, there are issues and steps you can take to alleviate them, and there's no reason to make immediate demands. This thread and your own research have hopefully given you a toolbox with which to approach the potential problem of your cat allergies and cohabitation with your fiancee. I hope you'll employ these tools with intelligence and patience. :)

[JohnAndrew]

I read somewhere that making love daily can lighten an allergic reaction.
This with the other good advice, can make the situation tolerable.

[rolexnub]

Originally Posted by Dr.Brian

There is no way I would voluntarily take those drugs long term. Give it a try, see if it works, but I suspect the cats have to go. That's not cat hating, that's common sense.
If my wife or children were alergic to dogs, the dogs would go to the breed rescue.

+1