"What's the Point of Even Trying?"

[ref1655]

words overheard & muttered by a kid during a youth league soccer game...

while walking through a park over the past weekend, this youngster was complaining to his soccer coach that even after demolishing their opponents in a spring season play-off game, everyone (even members of the losing team) received 'participation trophies' regardless of the final outcome/score...there was apparently no differentiation between the victors & the losers.

when the coach mentioned that his team (the winners) would be going out for pizza at Round Table, the kid replied, "so what?"...as the losing team would also be going out for pizza at the same restaurant.

this got me to thinking...at this early age (9-11), should winners be rewarded/acknowledged in some special manner or should it be kept on an even keel in terms of overall recognition? I could see the kid's point...they apparently had practiced hard/diligently & won the youth/rec league championship only to be tossed into the same category as the teams they had beaten.

the self-esteem 'experts' have their own philosophy regarding the nature & distribution of team rewards...to them, everyone is a 'winner' regardless of the final outcome. on the lower youth league soccer levels, they don't even keep score.

I sort of sympathized with the kid as it wasn't a case of bad sportsmanship, just a plea for some distinct recognition. looking back on my youth, there were never any 'participant' awards for losing Little League Baseball games. you either won or you lost as a team & like MLB, there was always next season.

[GradyPhilpott]

That's the whole idea of this nonsense: to kill motivation and exalt mediocrity. It has a name, but it is unspeakable.

Sent from my SM-G900V

[superdog]

Originally Posted by GradyPhilpott

That's the whole idea of this nonsense: to kill motivation and exalt mediocrity. It has a name, but it is unspeakable.

Sent from my SM-G900V

Pretty much sums it up.

Personally, as a kid, I got beaten at everything. And I really do mean everything. It made me try harder and I developed a work ethic.

I wonder what all these "winners" are going to do when they grow up and get into the real world with real competition.

Losing is just as good a lesson as winning. Sometimes, it's a better lesson.

[Gidget]

Welcome to "so and so's" America.


I would put in a political name but that's a no no.

[azguy]

People wonder why our country and youth are soft

I hire two interns every summer from ASU and haven't had one with any work ethic or gumption in years. In fact, two of the last eight didn't even make it through the 8 week internship because of BS excuses

Meanwhile, some even call me "dude or bro" during the interview process. I decided this year to hell with it, I'll spend 50% of my time in Huntington Beach this summer and not dedicate my extra time to an intern.

[JasoninDenver]

Maybe I have a different take but the rewards are not the trophies and pizzas.

The rewards are either knowing you won and being proud of your accomplishment or of knowing you lost and what you need to do to be better next time.

I have no doubt that the losers of the championship know to their core that they lost and are disappointed in that fact rather than proud of the fact that they participated.

Trophies, or any material markers, are meaningless in comparison. I hope I can do a good enough job of instilling this in my two young daughters.

[Knappo 1307]

Originally Posted by azguy

People wonder why our country and youth are soft

I hire two interns every summer from ASU and haven't had one with any work ethic or gumption in years. In fact, two of the last eight didn't even make it through the 8 week internship because of BS excuses

Meanwhile, some even call me "dude or bro" during the interview process. I decided this year to hell with it, I'll spend 50% of my time in Huntington Beach this summer and not dedicate my extra time to an intern.

Hmmm, you're the one doing the hiring. Maybe you should take a second look at the way YOU hire...IMHO

[Comacho]

Originally Posted by Knappo 1307

Hmmm, you're the one doing the hiring. Maybe you should take a second look at the way YOU hire...IMHO

There in lies a big part of the problem... These kids KNOW how to interview and in the relatively short time you have to make a decision, you really are just taking a guess. I'm pretty sure that I could convince you I was competent on a whole host of things that I really have no business doing as a "job"... Not that I'm a BS'er or a liar its just so hard to know who someone REALLY is in an interview (s).

We've had numerous employees at our Agency over the last 20 years. And if I had a dollar for every time management was wowed over a new hire, only to find out that were completely full of it. And had no real intention of ever trying once they were in the door so to speak. And these are some pretty sharp people getting fooled. Kinda sad really

[Knappo 1307]

Originally Posted by Comacho

There in lies a big part of the problem... These kids KNOW how to interview and in the relatively short time you have to make a decision, you really are just taking a guess. I'm pretty sure that I could convince you I was competent on a whole host of things that I really have no business doing as a "job"... Not that I'm a BS'er or a liar its just so hard to know who someone REALLY is in an interview (s).

We've had numerous employees at our Agency over the last 20 years. And if I had a dollar for every time management was wowed over a new hire, only to find out that were completely full of it. And had no real intention of ever trying once they were in the door so to speak. And these are some pretty sharp people getting fooled. Kinda sad really

I agree you can get fooled sometime. But everyone, or mostly every one in the last few years? Time to change the procedure....

[brandrea]

Learning how to win is important. Learning how to lose is important.
Teaching kids how to do both, gracefully, is also important.

[BNA/LION]

If at first you don't succeed (Win) Try, Try Again...

[TheVTCGuy]

When I saw the title of this thread I thought it was describing my dating life.....

[Wesley Crusher]

I saw something on the news the other day about how some kid sport leagues do not keep score of the games so there are no winners/losers. Kids are growing up thinking that not being ambitious is ok. Yea, let's see how well that mentality works out when kids graduate college with a degree in underwater basket weaving and are looking for a job.

Ridiculous, imho.

[masyv6]

I'm a pretty young guy. My mother and father never allowed to keep the participation trophies from the sports leagues I played in. I'm glad they didn't. My family didn't champion mediocrity and I'm better off for it.

[andromeda160]

when I was a wrestler it was win or lose, no participation trophies and that was awesome. The losses really hurt and making it to the podium felt great. Best part was there was a new tournament every weekend. I placed at states a few times. Unfortunately never completely won my weight class but that was a very rewarding experience. Football on the other hand, my team was lucky to win 2-3 games a season and we always got rewarded. I was a great player but I feel my team would've been better off had our parents told us we were losers and a pittance to watch. I kept my trophies from wrestling, I only kept my Defensive MVP trophies from football though.

[texex91]

Insanity at it's finest. The way US society is changing over the past many years.

Sad.

[Rolex addict]

Originally Posted by BNALION

If at first you don't succeed (Win) Try, Try Again...

Like getting that really cool AP? I'm sure they would let you buy 5 other models and then put you on a list.

[BNA/LION]

Originally Posted by Rolex addict

Like getting that really cool AP? I'm sure they would let you buy 5 other models and then put you on a list.

Now that is a Funny One!

[Rolex addict]

Originally Posted by TheVTCGuy

When I saw the title of this thread I thought it was describing my dating life.....

Me too, brother!!

[Rolex addict]

Originally Posted by BNALION

Now that is a Funny One!

Thought you would like that. Nothing like a slap in the nuts every now and then!!

[locutus49]

The product of the Self Esteem movement of the 80's.

[TheVTCGuy]

Originally Posted by Rolex addict

Me too, brother!!

Wanna hang out Saturday night Chad? We could go bowling... Maybe Bingo at the YMCA.... Do you like to play Canasta?





Sigh......

[Tri-Tip]

Originally Posted by brandrea

Learning how to win is important. Learning how to lose is important.
Teaching kids how to do both, gracefully, is also important.

Well said.

[mrricks]

Here's what happens in the real world.
I worked in auto sales for a few years. At the end of every month the dealer had a "Steak and Beans" dinner at a good steak restaurant. The top 50% of sales associates got to order the biggest, thickest, juiciest steak on the menu with all the trimmings. The other half got, well, you guessed it. We ate at a long table, steaks on one side, and facing them, the "losers" with a bowl of beans.
No "participation" trophies in sales businesses.

[CRM114]

"It's not whether you win or lose, it's how you play the Game".

That saying meant for the losers to take pride if you've put forth your best effort and played to the best of your ability even while enduring a disappointing Loss. For winners, it meant be proud at the moment, but temper it with knowing that the Win or winners aren't bigger than the Game itself. Glory is temporary.

Having winners and losers is an integral part of sports if it's to play any larger role in teaching lessons that could prepare one for Life's larger ones. Playing a game with no winners or losers isn't a Game, it's "Practice" or "Training".

Practice and Training teach nothing when it comes to learning how to be a good Winner or Loser.

Even if dumb adults completely miss the point of the concept and push their crazy idea that one prepares kids for realities of life by shielding them from all real life disappointment even minor ones on the field of sports where both can be managed to help them mature, those same kids are unfortunately learning a poor and limited facsimile of how it's done in the virtual world, winning and losing games on their computers, Playstations, iPads and phones.

American kids, entering adulthood already fat but with super-dexterous thumbs, thinking they can just press a reset button no matter what happens. Their experiences and lessons learned of winning/losing, teamwork, and effort are being taught by World of Warcraft and Candy Crush game designers instead of parents, teachers, and coaches.

[Star Ferry]

Reminds me of the seminal novella "The Christmas Sweater" by Glenn Beck -- a parable about how to face disappointment and persevere

[AK797]

Originally Posted by brandrea

Learning how to win is important. Learning how to lose is important.
Teaching kids how to do both, gracefully, is also important.

[mrricks]

"Winning isn't everything, it's the only thing"
Vince Lombardi

[Rolex addict]

Originally Posted by TheVTCGuy

Wanna hang out Saturday night Chad? We could go bowling... Maybe Bingo at the YMCA.... Do you like to play Canasta?





Sigh......

Only if I can wear my spandex.

[azguy]

Originally Posted by Knappo 1307

Hmmm, you're the one doing the hiring. Maybe you should take a second look at the way YOU hire...IMHO

You're right, must be my fault. Thanks