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JimSnyder · 28 January 2009, 02:24 AM

Yes, the new one is out!
Brand new edition of...
"You know
you're a redneck when......

1. You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.

2. You can entertain yourself for more than 15 minutes with a fly swatter.

3. Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.

4. You burn your yard rather than mow it.

5. You think "The Nutcracker" is a vice on the work bench

6. The Salvation Army declines your furniture.

7. You offer to give someone the shirt off your back and they don't want it.

8. You have the local taxidermist on speed dial.

9. You come back from the dump with more than you took.

10. You kee p a can of Raid on the kitchen table.

11. Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.

12. Your grandmother has "ammo" on her Christmas list.

13. You keep flea and tick soap in the shower.

14. You've been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.

15. You go to the stock car races and don't need
a program.

16. You know how many bales of hay your car will hold.

17. You have a rag for a gas cap.

18. Your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does.

19. You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean ?

20. You can spit without opening your mouth.

21. You consider your license plate personalized because your father made it.

22. Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

23. You have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say "Cool Whip" on the side.< /font>

24. The biggest city you've ever been to is Wal*Mart.

25. Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV

26. You've used your ironing board as a buffet table.

27. A tornado hits your neighborhood and does $100,000 worth of improvements.

28. You've used a toilet brush to scratch your back.

29. You missed your 5th grade graduation because you were on jury duty.

30. You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65 MPH.

redshirt1957 · 28 January 2009, 02:31 AM

Done 2 and 28.

In spring time when the carpenter bees are out and about, the kids get their badminton rackets out and whack the bejeezes out of them for fun. We call it redneck tennis.

JimSnyder · 28 January 2009, 02:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by redshirt1957

Done 2 and 28.

In spring time when the carpenter bees are out and about, the kids get their badminton rackets out and whack the bejeezes out of them for fun. We call it redneck tennis.

#12 is good!

B Square · 28 January 2009, 02:47 AM

Coming from a Buckeye, who we all know is nothing but a useless nut, I must say I resemble some these remarks. I rest my face.

Rolexitis · 28 January 2009, 06:06 AM

limbo · 28 January 2009, 06:17 AM

Bisquitlips · 28 January 2009, 10:00 AM

Latrodectus · 30 January 2009, 12:15 PM

JJ Irani · 30 January 2009, 12:18 PM

figbo · 30 January 2009, 03:28 PM

:thumb sup:

Launch Mini · 30 January 2009, 03:49 PM

Had #6 happen

onkyo · 30 January 2009, 04:09 PM

#1 & #2 here.

marshallr47 · 6 February 2009, 12:09 AM

Awesome!

TSW · 27 July 2011, 04:50 PM

mitchy · 28 July 2011, 01:15 AM

28 January 2009, 02:47 AM	#4
B Square "TRF" Member Join Date: Sep 2008 Real Name: Boyd Location: NC Posts: 1,815	Coming from a Buckeye, who we all know is nothing but a useless nut, I must say I resemble some these remarks. I rest my face. __________________ 16610M 16710Z Pepsi 16570V White

28 January 2009, 06:06 AM	#5
Rolexitis "TRF" Member Join Date: May 2008 Real Name: Matt Location: Earth Watch: 114060 Posts: 3,203	__________________ Card Carrying Member of the Global Association of Retro-Grouch-Curmudgeons

28 January 2009, 10:00 AM	#7
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30 January 2009, 12:15 PM	#8
Latrodectus 2024 SubLV41 Pledge Member Join Date: Sep 2008 Real Name: Fred Location: KY, USA Watch: GMT-Master II Posts: 10,043	__________________ Member # 16057 4-Hands Club Tosser Club Member TRF Skypers Group

30 January 2009, 12:18 PM	#9
JJ Irani Fondly Remembered Join Date: May 2005 Real Name: JJ Location: Auckland, NZ Watch: ALL SOLD!! Posts: 74,319	__________________ Words fail me in expressing my utmost thanks to ALL of you for this wonderful support during my hour of need!! I firmly believe that my time on planet earth is NOT yet up!! I shall fight this to the very end.......and WIN!!

28 January 2009, 02:24 AM	#1
JimSnyder "TRF" Member Join Date: Feb 2007 Real Name: Jim Snyder Location: Ohio Watch: Ask me later..... Posts: 7,726	More Redneck facts Yes, the new one is out! Brand new edition of... "You know you're a redneck when...... 1. You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree. 2. You can entertain yourself for more than 15 minutes with a fly swatter. 3. Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years. 4. You burn your yard rather than mow it. 5. You think "The Nutcracker" is a vice on the work bench 6. The Salvation Army declines your furniture. 7. You offer to give someone the shirt off your back and they don't want it. 8. You have the local taxidermist on speed dial. 9. You come back from the dump with more than you took. 10. You kee p a can of Raid on the kitchen table. 11. Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat. 12. Your grandmother has "ammo" on her Christmas list. 13. You keep flea and tick soap in the shower. 14. You've been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog. 15. You go to the stock car races and don't need a program. 16. You know how many bales of hay your car will hold. 17. You have a rag for a gas cap. 18. Your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does. 19. You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean ? 20. You can spit without opening your mouth. 21. You consider your license plate personalized because your father made it. 22. Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand. 23. You have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say "Cool Whip" on the side.< /font> 24. The biggest city you've ever been to is Wal*Mart. 25. Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV 26. You've used your ironing board as a buffet table. 27. A tornado hits your neighborhood and does $100,000 worth of improvements. 28. You've used a toilet brush to scratch your back. 29. You missed your 5th grade graduation because you were on jury duty. 30. You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65 MPH. __________________ "You ain't lived, 'til you've had your tires rotated by a red-headed women."

28 January 2009, 02:31 AM	#2
redshirt1957 "TRF" Member Join Date: Sep 2007 Real Name: Bubba Location: Bitsyville! Watch: Blue YM today! Posts: 10,053	Done 2 and 28. In spring time when the carpenter bees are out and about, the kids get their badminton rackets out and whack the bejeezes out of them for fun. We call it redneck tennis.

28 January 2009, 06:17 AM	#6
limbo "TRF" Member Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Sydney Posts: 4,624

30 January 2009, 03:28 PM	#10
figbo "TRF" Member Join Date: Jan 2008 Real Name: El Raf-O Location: florida Watch: tt GMT2c,Omega Posts: 19,687	:thumb sup:

30 January 2009, 03:49 PM	#11
Launch Mini "TRF" Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Real Name: John Location: Canada, eh Watch: can I? Posts: 6,240	Had #6 happen __________________ Something witty to go here. Member # 293

30 January 2009, 04:09 PM	#12
onkyo Banned Join Date: Apr 2008 Real Name: Pav Location: Manhattan Posts: 11,495	#1 & #2 here.

6 February 2009, 12:09 AM	#13
marshallr47 "TRF" Member Join Date: Oct 2006 Real Name: Ron Location: Alabama Watch: Daytona,TT Sub,GMT Posts: 4,673	Awesome! __________________ Ron

27 July 2011, 04:50 PM	#14
TSW "TRF" Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Real Name: TSW Location: Le Brassus Watch: Rolex & AP's Posts: 27,449	__________________ AP Owners Club IG @swiss.watch.connection

28 July 2011, 01:15 AM	#15
mitchy "TRF" Member Join Date: Apr 2010 Real Name: Mitch Location: . Watch: 116710LN Posts: 2,495	__________________ Time you enjoy wasting, was not wasted John Lennon

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