Are people getting... angrier?

[ijen0311]

I took a trip to the mall today.

While pulling into the parking garage, I made a left turn in front of a man and woman in a pick up truck. After almost running into me, they yelled at me and gave me the finger. Silly me, I thought they would actually stop at their stop sign

Went into the mall, over to Gap. Stood in front of the counter to make a return. A moment later, another customer approached to make a return as well. Sales associate came over and asked who was first. Before I could open my mouth she said "me" and threw her stuff on the counter. When I looked at her, she gave me a dirty look.

Next I go to the food court. While paying for my food, there is a middle-aged woman with a younger man and woman. They were waiting for their food. Cashier motions me to be rung up, and I point at them to make sure they are not waiting to pay. She rings me up, and while my card is going through I reach behind the older woman for some red pepper (I didn't say excuse me because they were talking and I really wasn't in her way). The young woman with them looks at me and says, "stupid b!tch." (To be honest, I really really wanted to say something to her. But I was good.)

What is going on with our society?
Can't we all have some basic patience and kindness towards our fellow man? Isn't there enough anger in the world?

[scottschoe]

Maybe time for a new mall?

[kcmo]

Wow Jen, it's unfortunate to hear about people who obviously have no manners! I would have had a harder time keeping my mouth shut but you did the right thing. Not worth your time.

[ijen0311]

Originally Posted by kcmo

Wow Jen, it's unfortunate to hear about people who obviously have no manners! I would have had a harder time keeping my mouth shut but you did the right thing. Not worth your time.

I just wanted to eat my Sbarro!!

[iSellJerseyShore]

Originally Posted by ijen0311

I just wanted to eat my Sbarro!!

Sbarro stromboli's = YUMMY!!!!!


I think people are getting angrier as everyone is in such a RUSH, where are they rushing to??? Probably no where - its a ME, ME, ME society we live in. Everyone feels that they "deserve" something, whether its a raise at work, to be first in line or to not have to stop at stop signs because they were there a split second before you even though they don't have the right of way.

It's sad that society has come to what it has come to..... There is very little respect or class!! Everyone thinks that class is something you attend!!!

Being part of a community like TRF is so pleasurable to exchange messages with people from all over the world, it allows all of us to connect and build friendships. From what I have seen the population here at TRF (sounds like im talking about a prison) has class and respect.



Regards,


-Frankie

[txbikerdude]

Originally Posted by iSellJerseyShore

Sbarro stromboli's = YUMMY!!!!!


I think people are getting angrier as everyone is in such a RUSH, where are they rushing to??? Probably no where - its a ME, ME, ME society we live in. Everyone feels that they "deserve" something, whether its a raise at work, to be first in line or to not have to stop at stop signs because they were there a split second before you even though they don't have the right of way.

It's sad that society has come to what it has come to..... There is very little respect or class!! Everyone thinks that class is something you attend!!!

Being part of a community like TRF is so pleasurable to exchange messages with people from all over the world, it allows all of us to connect and build friendships. From what I have seen the population here at TRF (sounds like im talking about a prison) has class and respect.



Regards,


-Frankie

yea i remember watching all these tv shows about times in the 40's and 50's, were people back then really that nice to everyone? compared to today it is a shame, we (as a people) are rude, impatient, and like you said, think we deserve everything. it is amazing, but i have to admit, I am that person sometimes too, ill get worked up and before i realize it im treating people like crap. im trying to do better

[iSellJerseyShore]

Originally Posted by txbikerdude

yea i remember watching all these tv shows about times in the 40's and 50's, were people back then really that nice to everyone? compared to today it is a shame, we (as a people) are rude, impatient, and like you said, think we deserve everything. it is amazing, but i have to admit, I am that person sometimes too, ill get worked up and before i realize it im treating people like crap. im trying to do better

I am guilty of it too I will admit!

Recently I have shifted my thinking and have been trying to see things from a different point of view to not get like that and its worked rather well for me so far.

I can now see all of the idiots clearly now!! Kinda like being the only sober one at a party....................



-Frankie

[ohsixx]

I think those people you encountered were "North Florida Rednecks". I do everything I can to avoid them, but sometimes it is impossible to do so.

The "have nots" are full of jealously and hate. When they see someone that appears upscale in some way it infuriates them. Maybe it is a good thing they did not see your watch.

[ijen0311]

Originally Posted by ohsixx

I think those people you encountered were "North Florida Rednecks". I do everything I can to avoid them, but sometimes it is impossible to do so.

The "have nots" are full of jealously and hate. When they see someone that appears upscale in some way it infuriates them. Maybe it is a good thing they did not see your watch.

you....are....soooo....right! We shall call them the NFRs. (my least favorite part of Jacksonville)

That's part of the reason I didn't say anything to the last woman. I didn't want to get followed out to my car and have something bad happen.

[swatty]

Hey Jen , maybe you should move to Oz , we are all really nice .

[Mosco]

Move to Ohio - it is common knowledge that people are the nicest here. I truly enjoy living here, as I consider myself a fairly nice guy!

[Latrodectus]

Sometimes you run into angry people...nothing you can do...thank god it is not too often!!!

[astcell]

Maybe they are all jealous of your Rolex?

[ijen0311]

Originally Posted by astcell

Maybe they are all jealous of your Rolex?

That's what it is! HATERS!

[Taffi Abernathy]

People act-out for all kinds of reasons, most of the time having little or nothing to do with you. It's simply a matter of their anger is right there on the surface, and it takes little provocation for the person to release it. Also, there are aggressive types who actively seek confrontation because they elevate their self-esteem by bullying others. What happened today would have likely happened to anyone standing there - it wasn't personal. Nonetheless, I would have probably said something since saying nothing is akin to condoning the behavior, not necessarily "being good," You obviously felt strongly enough about what happened to bring it back to the forums and write about it. Think of something assertive, not aggressive, you might say should you find yourself in this type of situation again.

[ijen0311]

Originally Posted by Taffi Abernathy

People act-out for all kinds of reasons, most of the time having little or nothing to do with you. It's simply a matter of their anger is right there on the surface, and it takes little provocation for the person to release it. Also, there are aggressive types who actively seek confrontation because they elevate their self-esteem by bullying others. What happened today would have likely happened to anyone standing there - it wasn't personal. Nonetheless, I would have probably said something since saying nothing is akin to condoning the behavior, not necessarily "being good," You obviously felt strongly enough about what happened to bring it back to the forums and write about it. Think of something assertive, not aggressive, you might do should you find yourself in this type of situation again.

Thanks Faith

I agree with you completely.... and really, I'm not so much upset about what happened as I'm just confused. It seems like such a waste of energy to act so ridiculous!

I will have to think of something assertive for next time. I always think of something good to say after it's happened!

[Lisa]

Originally Posted by Taffi Abernathy

People act-out for all kinds of reasons, most of the time having little or nothing to do with you. It's simply a matter of their anger is right there on the surface, and it takes little provocation for the person to release it. Also, there are aggressive types who actively seek confrontation because they elevate their self-esteem by bullying others. What happened today would have likely happened to anyone standing there - it wasn't personal. Nonetheless, I would have probably said something since saying nothing is akin to condoning the behavior, not necessarily "being good," You obviously felt strongly enough about what happened to bring it back to the forums and write about it. Think of something assertive, not aggressive, you might say should you find yourself in this type of situation again.

Once I was at a dairy store buying some milk and the clerk was just furious over something - she slammed my items around, demanded my ID with the check, just very curt to say the least. Something just made me look her in the eye and say, "I'm sorry - you must have had an awful day today." And you know what? She started to cry and said, Yes she had.

You just never know. But it definitely paid to say something nice.

[Taffi Abernathy]

Originally Posted by Lisa

Once I was at a dairy store buying some milk and the clerk was just furious over something - she slammed my items around, demanded my ID with the check, just very curt to say the least. Something just made me look her in the eye and say, "I'm sorry - you must have had an awful day today." And you know what? She started to cry and said, Yes she had.

You just never know. But it definitely paid to say something nice.

Lisa,

I agree that your approach was very effective in that instance. While it sounds like the clerk was quite rude, in Jen's case, the person referred to her as "a stupid bitch." Do you really feel you could have demonstrated the same degree of "empathy" had she directed this exact comment to you? I personally think it might be more difficult and here is my rationale: In your case, the clerk undoubtedly behaved in a passive-aggressive manner. But in Jen's case, the girl's hostility was arguably acted out more directly and may have been perceived as a more personal attack, IMO, further decreasing the likelihood that one would want to reach out. Faith

[2careless]

Rude people are everywhere nowadays. Talk about their upbringings.
And don't get me started on road rages.

[Mosco]

Kill them with kindness - that will confuse them, as well as make them feel like complete arses. Just dont act scared.

[ijen0311]

Originally Posted by Mosco

Kill them with kindness - that will confuse them, as well as make them feel like complete arses. Just dont act scared.

I like the Cincinatti offer!

Know anyone in need of a social work manager?

[Lion]

Jen, today most people are impatient and if they have been taught manners they forgot how to use them!!! Some people feel they do not have to acknowledge others or respect their space. So we end up with anger management issues which can escalate to violence. I'm am a person who speaks my mind and will speak up when I see others being so callus toward me!!! Except when I'm in a car because possible road rage leads to insanity.

[away36]

Jen...I was in my drugstore yesterday to pick up my prescription. There was a man sitting in a chair near the counter. His son....about 14 or so, sat beside him. Another customer was already at the counter. Not wanting to "butt in", I asked..."Sir? Are you in line here?" He literally barked at me..."YES! I AM!!!" So...I just stayed where I was. He was next....got up to the counter and the pharmacist said..."Sir, your doctor gave us explicit instructions not to refill this prescription before 30 days are up. You'll have to wait a couple more days." Well....he went absolutely psycho. He was shouting and freaking out and being incredibly rude. It made me feel really uncomfortable and I felt SO bad for the pharmacy staff...and even worse for his poor son who seemed to be cringing with embarassment. I couldn't wait to pay for my prescription and get out of there!

[Bisquitlips]

Originally Posted by away36

Jen...I was in my drugstore yesterday to pick up my prescription. There was a man sitting in a chair near the counter. His son....about 14 or so, sat beside him. Another customer was already at the counter. Not wanting to "butt in", I asked..."Sir? Are you in line here?" He literally barked at me..."YES! I AM!!!" So...I just stayed where I was. He was next....got up to the counter and the pharmacist said..."Sir, your doctor gave us explicit instructions not to refill this prescription before 30 days are up. You'll have to wait a couple more days." Well....he went absolutely psycho. He was shouting and freaking out and being incredibly rude. It made me feel really uncomfortable and I felt SO bad for the pharmacy staff...and even worse for his poor son who seemed to be cringing with embarassment. I couldn't wait to pay for my prescription and get out of there!

Obviously a prescription addict! They are everywhere!

[Scream]

Jen you could relocate to the Central New York area but are you willing to deal with 150" of snow annually?

[ijen0311]

Originally Posted by away36

Jen...I was in my drugstore yesterday to pick up my prescription. There was a man sitting in a chair near the counter. His son....about 14 or so, sat beside him. Another customer was already at the counter. Not wanting to "butt in", I asked..."Sir? Are you in line here?" He literally barked at me..."YES! I AM!!!" So...I just stayed where I was. He was next....got up to the counter and the pharmacist said..."Sir, your doctor gave us explicit instructions not to refill this prescription before 30 days are up. You'll have to wait a couple more days." Well....he went absolutely psycho. He was shouting and freaking out and being incredibly rude. It made me feel really uncomfortable and I felt SO bad for the pharmacy staff...and even worse for his poor son who seemed to be cringing with embarassment. I couldn't wait to pay for my prescription and get out of there!

I bet pharmacists see this a lot!

But, it's a perfect example...

Here's another story. Once I went to Walgreens to make a copy of a photo from a cruise (it was a formal night photo).
The photo guy called me up and said he couldn't copy it because it was a professional photo. (When the guy serving you Bahama Mamas during the day takes your picture at night... it's hardly professional! ) I said "ok, thanks" and started to walk away.
He called me back and said "well, I'll do it for you since you were nice. Usually people just yell at me."

Niceness pays, people!

[Troy]

Yes they are and the parents of these little gang holes should be deported with their little azzhole children and seize all assets too just my 2 cents

[Bisquitlips]

Originally Posted by ijen0311

I bet pharmacists see this a lot!

But, it's a perfect example...

Here's another story. Once I went to Walgreens to make a copy of a photo from a cruise (it was a formal night photo).
The photo guy called me up and said he couldn't copy it because it was a professional photo. (When the guy serving you Bahama Mamas during the day takes your picture at night... it's hardly professional! ) I said "ok, thanks" and started to walk away.
He called me back and said "well, I'll do it for you since you were nice. Usually people just yell at me."

Niceness pays, people!

I have found that being "different" (very gracious) is the key that opens many doors!

One of the things that I do when taking a flight is to compliment the air carrier just prior to coming up to the ticket counter. I do it rather loudly and purposely! Making sure that the airline ticket counter personnel hear me.

I can't tell you the number of times that this has paid off! These poor people hear nothing but bitching and complaints in their working lives. To hear one person that compliments them on their work does wonders for their attitude!

Was actually bumped from coach to 1st class due to a timely compliment!

A word in due season is joy and "how good it is"!!

[AIKO]

Originally Posted by away36

Jen...I was in my drugstore yesterday to pick up my prescription. There was a man sitting in a chair near the counter. His son....about 14 or so, sat beside him. Another customer was already at the counter. Not wanting to "butt in", I asked..."Sir? Are you in line here?" He literally barked at me..."YES! I AM!!!" So...I just stayed where I was. He was next....got up to the counter and the pharmacist said..."Sir, your doctor gave us explicit instructions not to refill this prescription before 30 days are up. You'll have to wait a couple more days." Well....he went absolutely psycho. He was shouting and freaking out and being incredibly rude. It made me feel really uncomfortable and I felt SO bad for the pharmacy staff...and even worse for his poor son who seemed to be cringing with embarassment. I couldn't wait to pay for my prescription and get out of there!

Sounds like he wanted his narcotic pain meds refilled early for the 10 straight month.

[Lisa]

Originally Posted by AIKO

Sounds like he wanted his narcotic pain meds refilled early for the 10 straight month.

My thoughts exactly.