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padi56 · 10 April 2010, 03:17 AM

A guy from New Zealand buys several sheep, hoping to breed them for wool.

After several weeks, he notices that none of the sheep are getting pregnant, and phones a vet for help.

The vet tells him that he should try artificial insemination.

The New Zealand guy doesn't have the slightest idea what this means but, not wanting to display his ignorance, only asks the vet how he will know when the sheep are pregnant.

The vet tells him that they will stop standing around and instead will lie down and wallow in grass when they are pregnant.

The man hangs up and gives it some thought. He comes to the conclusion that artificial insemination means he has to impregnate the sheep himself.

So, he loads the sheep into his trusty Japanese car, drives them out into the woods, has sex with them all, brings them back, and goes to bed.

Next morning, he wakes and looks out at the sheep. Seeing that they are all still standing around, he deduces that the first try didn't take, and loads them in the car again.

He drives them out to the woods, bangs each sheep twice for good measure, brings them back, and goes to bed exhausted.

Next morning, he wakes to find the sheep still just standing round.

Try again.. he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up, and drive them out to the woods. He spends all day sh@gg#ng the sheep,and fast winding his watches,and upon returning home, falls listlessly into bed.But then noticed his arms were becoming quite wooly,and started to worry he might be turning into one of his wooly back sheep.

The next morning, he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look out of the window BaaaBaaaaBaaaa he cried.

He asks his wife to look, and tell him if the sheep are lying in the grass.

No, she says,

they're all in the car,some on the roof

and one of them is even beeping the horn.

Safetrends · 10 April 2010, 03:44 AM

JJ Irani · 10 April 2010, 05:06 AM

limbo · 10 April 2010, 05:40 AM

Lion · 11 April 2010, 12:20 AM

Very funny!!!

Dr. Robert · 11 April 2010, 05:02 AM

hilarious!

chrislkb · 11 April 2010, 01:37 PM

idk01 · 12 April 2010, 01:14 AM

onkyo · 12 April 2010, 01:52 AM

Chipmunk · 12 April 2010, 07:13 AM

datejust1 · 12 April 2010, 07:25 AM

hahahahah!!

rfknauss · 12 April 2010, 08:21 AM

sleddog · 12 April 2010, 01:29 PM

:r ofl:

swatty · 12 April 2010, 07:36 PM

True story

:r ofl:

10 April 2010, 03:17 AM	#1
padi56 "TRF" Life Patron Join Date: Jun 2005 Real Name: Peter Location: Llanfairpwllgwyng Watch: ing you. Posts: 53,060	A Tale of a Few Sheep. A guy from New Zealand buys several sheep, hoping to breed them for wool. After several weeks, he notices that none of the sheep are getting pregnant, and phones a vet for help. The vet tells him that he should try artificial insemination. The New Zealand guy doesn't have the slightest idea what this means but, not wanting to display his ignorance, only asks the vet how he will know when the sheep are pregnant. The vet tells him that they will stop standing around and instead will lie down and wallow in grass when they are pregnant. The man hangs up and gives it some thought. He comes to the conclusion that artificial insemination means he has to impregnate the sheep himself. So, he loads the sheep into his trusty Japanese car, drives them out into the woods, has sex with them all, brings them back, and goes to bed. Next morning, he wakes and looks out at the sheep. Seeing that they are all still standing around, he deduces that the first try didn't take, and loads them in the car again. He drives them out to the woods, bangs each sheep twice for good measure, brings them back, and goes to bed exhausted. Next morning, he wakes to find the sheep still just standing round. Try again.. he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up, and drive them out to the woods. He spends all day sh@gg#ng the sheep,and fast winding his watches,and upon returning home, falls listlessly into bed.But then noticed his arms were becoming quite wooly,and started to worry he might be turning into one of his wooly back sheep. The next morning, he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look out of the window BaaaBaaaaBaaaa he cried. He asks his wife to look, and tell him if the sheep are lying in the grass. No, she says, they're all in the car,some on the roof and one of them is even beeping the horn. __________________ ICom Pro3 All posts are my own opinion and my opinion only. "The clock of life is wound but once, and no man has the power to tell just when the hands will stop. Now is the only time you actually own the time, Place no faith in time, for the clock may soon be still for ever." Good Judgement comes from experience,experience comes from Bad Judgement,.Buy quality, cry once; buy cheap, cry again and again. www.mc0yad.club Second in command CEO and left handed watch winder Last edited by padi56; 11 April 2010 at 04:49 AM..

10 April 2010, 03:44 AM	#2
Safetrends Banned Join Date: Oct 2009 Real Name: David Walz Location: San Diego CA USA Watch: my hand. :) Posts: 9,156	Attached Images

10 April 2010, 05:06 AM	#3
JJ Irani Fondly Remembered Join Date: May 2005 Real Name: JJ Location: Auckland, NZ Watch: ALL SOLD!! Posts: 74,319	__________________ Words fail me in expressing my utmost thanks to ALL of you for this wonderful support during my hour of need!! I firmly believe that my time on planet earth is NOT yet up!! I shall fight this to the very end.......and WIN!!

11 April 2010, 12:20 AM	#5
Lion "TRF" Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Real Name: Leo Location: Midwest Watch: GMT-II 16710 PEPSI Posts: 21,461	Very funny!!! __________________ SS GMT-II 16710 PEPSI(Z-serial#) THE ONLY DIFFERENCE BETWEEN MEN AND BOYS IS THE PRICE OF THE TOYS!!! MontBlanc Meisterstuck Doue Silver Barley MontBlanc Meisterstuck Solitaire Doue Signum Proud Card Carrying Member of the Curmudgeons.....Yikes!!!

11 April 2010, 01:37 PM	#7
chrislkb "TRF" Member Join Date: Dec 2007 Real Name: Christopher Location: Singapore Watch: out kiddo! Posts: 1,033	__________________ Viva La Rolex

10 April 2010, 05:40 AM	#4
limbo "TRF" Member Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Sydney Posts: 4,624

11 April 2010, 05:02 AM	#6
Dr. Robert 2024 SubLV41 Pledge Member Join Date: Dec 2009 Real Name: Bob Location: U.S.A. Watch: 1655 Posts: 64,241	hilarious!

12 April 2010, 01:14 AM	#8
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12 April 2010, 01:52 AM	#9
onkyo Banned Join Date: Apr 2008 Real Name: Pav Location: Manhattan Posts: 11,495

12 April 2010, 07:13 AM	#10
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12 April 2010, 07:25 AM	#11
datejust1 Banned Join Date: Sep 2009 Real Name: G Location: N/A Watch: N/A Posts: 6,042	hahahahah!!

12 April 2010, 08:21 AM	#12
rfknauss 2024 SubLV41 Pledge Member Join Date: Nov 2009 Real Name: Richard Location: Macungie, PA Watch: 5513 Sub, LV Sub Posts: 14,497	__________________ *"Few things in life give man as great a pleasure as wearing a Rolex!"* TRF's "AFTER DARK" Bar & NightClub Patron

12 April 2010, 01:29 PM	#13
sleddog TRF Moderator & 2024 SubLV41 Patron Join Date: Jul 2007 Real Name: Rob Location: Nearby. Posts: 24,931	:r ofl: __________________ He who wears a Rolex is always on time, even when late!! TRF's "After Dark" Bar & Nightclub Patron-Founding Member..

12 April 2010, 07:36 PM	#14
swatty 2024 SubLV41 Pledge Member Join Date: Dec 2007 Real Name: Peter Location: Sydney Watch: The Game Posts: 17,415	True story :r ofl:

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