What kids say

[Aqua fobic]

A number of Primary Schools were doing a project on "The Sea". Kids were
>asked to draw pictures, or write about their experiences.
>Teachers got together to compare the results, and put together some of the
>comments that were funny, and some that were sad. Here are some of them.
>The
>kids were all aged between 5 and 8 years.
>
>This is a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles. (Kelly age 6)
>
>Whales are animals, not fish. If they don't get air they can drown, like my
>brother did last summer. (David age 7)
>
>Oyster's balls are called pearls. (James age 6)
>
>I don't like the sea. It makes me sick on the ferry. (Peter age 6)
>
>My goldfish died. Why? (Katie age 5)
>
>If you are surrounded by sea you are an Island. If you don't have sea all
>round you, you are in continent. (Wayne age 7)
>
>I think sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth, just like Emily
>Richardson. She's not my friend no more. (Kylie age 6)
>
>A dolphin breaths through an arsehole on the top of it's head. (Billy age
>8)
>
>My uncle goes out in his boat with pots, and comes back with crabs. (Millie
>age 6)
>
>When ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds to cross the ocean.
>Sometimes, when the wind didn't blow, the sailors would whistle to make the
>wind come. My brother said they would be better off eating beans. (William
>age 7)
>
>I like mermaids. They are beautiful, and I like their shiny tails. How do
>mermaids get pregnant? (Helen age 6)
>
>I'm not going to write about the sea. My baby brother is always screaming
>and being sick, my Dad keeps shouting at my Mum, and my big sister has just
>got pregnant, so I can't think what to write. (Amy age 6)
>
>Some fish are dangerous. Jelly fish can sting. Electric eels can give you a
>shock. They have to live in caves under the sea where I think they have to
>plug themselves into chargers. (Christopher age 7)
>
>My mum has fish nets, but doesn't catch any fish. (Laura age 5)
>
>When you go swimming in the sea, it is very cold, and it makes my willy
>small. (Kevin age 6)
>
>When me and Sarah went to the sea side in the summer holidays, we hid in
>the
>sand dunes and watched my big sister doing it with her boy friend. It was
>fun. (Lauren age 7)
>
>A submarine goes under the water like a fish, but it has lots of seamen
>inside. (Emma age 5)
>
>When I grow up, I want to be captain of a big ship, and have lots of
>sailors
>(Valerie age 6)
>
>Divers have to be safe when they go under the water. Two divers can't go
>down alone, so they have to go down on each other. (Becky age 8)
>
>On holiday my Mum went water ski-ing. She fell off when she was going very
>fast. She says she won't do it again because water shot up her fanny.
>(Julie
>age 7)

[JJ Irani]

[TDH]

[limbo]

[Ashley]

Ah, kids.

[jasonbellevue]

[BiG JeEzY]

Kids say the darnest things dont they?