The Rolex Forums   The Rolex Watch

ROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEX


Go Back   Rolex Forums - Rolex Forum > General Topics > Jokes & Cartoons

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 21 December 2009, 07:11 AM   #1
shaggy
"TRF" Member
 
shaggy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
Real Name: Brett
Location: leeds,uk
Watch: BLUE ARAB DAYTONA
Posts: 691
Darwin awards

unbelievable


Here is the glorious winner:

1. When his 38 caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended victim during a hold-up in Long Beach , California would-be robber James Elliot did something that can only inspire wonder. He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it worked.

And now, the honourable mentions:

2. The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat cutting machine and after a little shopping around, submitted a claim to his insurance company. The company expecting negligence sent out one of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and he also lost a finger. The chef's claim was approved.

3. A man who shovelled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a woman had taken the space. Understandably, he shot her.

4. After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies.. The deception wasn't discovered for 3 days.

5. An American teenager was in the hospital recovering from serious head wounds received from an oncoming train. When asked how he received the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to see how close he could get his head to a moving train before he was hit.

6. A man walked into a Louisiana Circle-K, put a $20 bill on the counter, and asked for change. When the clerk opened the cash drawer, the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the register, which the clerk promptly provided. The man took the cash from the clerk and fled, leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The total amount of cash he got from the drawer... $15. [If someone points a gun at you and gives you money, is a crime committed?]

7. Seems an Arkansas guy wanted some beer pretty badly.. He decided that he'd just throw a cinder block through a liquor store window, grab some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinder block and heaved it over his head at the window. The cinder block bounced back and hit the would-be thief on the head, knocking him unconscious. The liquor store window was made of Plexiglas. The whole event was caught on videotape.

8. As a female shopper exited a New York convenience store, a man grabbed her purse and ran. The clerk called 911 immediately, and the woman was able to give them a detailed description of the snatcher. Within minutes, the police apprehended the snatcher. They put him in the car and drove back to the store. The thief was then taken out of the car and told to stand there for a positive ID. To which he replied, "Yes, officer, that's her. That's the lady I stole the purse from."

9. The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a Burger King in Ypsilanti , Michigan at 5 A.M., flashed a gun, and demanded cash. The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't open the cash register without a food order. When the man ordered onion rings, the clerk said they weren't available for breakfast... The man, frustrated, walked away. [*A 5-STAR STUPIDITY AWARD WINNER]

10. When a man attempted to siphon gasoline from a motor home parked on a Seattle street, he got much more than he bargained for.. Police arrived at the scene to find a very sick man curled up next to a motor home near spilled sewage. A police spokesman said that the man admitted to trying to steal gasoline, but he plugged his siphon hose into the motor home's sewage tank by mistake. The owner of the vehicle declined to press charges saying that it was the best laugh he'd ever had.
shaggy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 21 December 2009, 07:16 AM   #2
JJ Irani
Fondly Remembered
 
JJ Irani's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Real Name: JJ
Location: Auckland, NZ
Watch: ALL SOLD!!
Posts: 74,319
All terrific, but I think this should be moved to the Jokes & Cartoons section.

JJ
__________________
Words fail me in expressing my utmost thanks to ALL of you for this wonderful support during my hour of need!!

I firmly believe that my time on planet earth is NOT yet up!! I shall fight this to the very end.......and WIN!!
JJ Irani is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 21 December 2009, 07:18 AM   #3
Safetrends
Banned
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Real Name: David Walz
Location: San Diego CA USA
Watch: my hand. :)
Posts: 9,156


Safetrends is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 21 December 2009, 07:52 AM   #4
Rockrolex
TRF Moderator & 2024 SubLV41 Patron
 
Rockrolex's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Real Name: God
Location: Washington, D.C.
Watch: What do you think?
Posts: 37,955
JJ's right about this one (unbelieveable but true).

Funny as it is, the thread has been moved to a more appropriate place.

And for the good of all, I corrected the spelling of Darwin's name.
__________________
Despite the high cost of living, it's still very popular.

Tosser Cabinet Member

Official Member: 'Perpetual 30' Vegas International GTG 2016
Official Member "WIS-CON" Las Vegas International GTG 2017
Official Member "WIS-CON" Las Vegas International GTG 2018
Official Member "WIS-CON" Las Vegas International GTG 2019
Rockrolex is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 21 December 2009, 08:59 AM   #5
shaggy
"TRF" Member
 
shaggy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
Real Name: Brett
Location: leeds,uk
Watch: BLUE ARAB DAYTONA
Posts: 691
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rockrolex View Post

And for the good of all, I corrected the spelling of Darwin's name.
thanks
misspent youth
shaggy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 21 December 2009, 09:28 AM   #6
Rockrolex
TRF Moderator & 2024 SubLV41 Patron
 
Rockrolex's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Real Name: God
Location: Washington, D.C.
Watch: What do you think?
Posts: 37,955
Quote:
Originally Posted by shaggy View Post
thanks
misspent youth
Or misspelt youth?
__________________
Despite the high cost of living, it's still very popular.

Tosser Cabinet Member

Official Member: 'Perpetual 30' Vegas International GTG 2016
Official Member "WIS-CON" Las Vegas International GTG 2017
Official Member "WIS-CON" Las Vegas International GTG 2018
Official Member "WIS-CON" Las Vegas International GTG 2019
Rockrolex is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 21 December 2009, 09:53 AM   #7
toph
"TRF" Member
 
toph's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Real Name: ChrisTOPHer
Location: Sydney
Watch: Rolex, Brellum,
Posts: 12,601
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rockrolex View Post
Or misspelt youth?
or misspelt yuoth
__________________


"Where no counsel is the people fall, but in the multitude of counselors there is safety."

Member No.# 11795
toph is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 21 December 2009, 10:08 AM   #8
Bisquitlips
2024 Pledge Member
 
Bisquitlips's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Real Name: Richard
Location: USA
Watch: YM Deep Space
Posts: 12,521
__________________
Rolex Yacht-Master 40mm (SS-YG / Deep Space MOP) 16623
Breitling Aerospace Titanium / 18K with UTC.
Omega Speedmaster 3510.50
Oris TT1 Pro Diver Regulator 43MM
Bisquitlips is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 21 December 2009, 06:40 PM   #9
Bullyterrier
"TRF" Member
 
Bullyterrier's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: .
Posts: 1,343
Brilliant!
__________________
So Mote it be.
Bullyterrier is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 21 December 2009, 09:50 PM   #10
limbo
"TRF" Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Sydney
Posts: 4,624
limbo is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 22 December 2009, 06:56 AM   #11
snow_rocks
Banned
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Real Name: Rick
Location: At what TIME?!!!
Watch: the SKY tonite!
Posts: 3,225
Sorry for their luck, eh!
snow_rocks is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 22 December 2009, 09:17 AM   #12
pz93c
"TRF" Member
 
pz93c's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Real Name: Brian
Location: Republic of Texas
Posts: 2,776
pz93c is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 4 January 2010, 02:39 PM   #13
idk01
"TRF" Member
 
idk01's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Real Name: Dave
Location: Australia
Watch: DJ16233TT
Posts: 18,485
__________________
Apprentice to Terry Newton; Superstar and Fake Sleuth

idk01 is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Wrist Aficionado

DavidSW Watches

Takuya Watches

OCWatches

Asset Appeal


*Banners Of The Month*
This space is provided to horological resources.





Copyright ©2004-2024, The Rolex Forums. All Rights Reserved.

ROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEXROLEX

Rolex is a registered trademark of ROLEX USA. The Rolex Forums is not affiliated with ROLEX USA in any way.