The spoons

[Goodwatch]

The businessman took some clients out to dinner last week and noticed a spoon in the shirt pocket of the waiter as he handed out the menus. It seemed a little odd, but he dismissed it as a random thing until the busboy came with water and tableware; he, too, sported a spoon in his breast pocket.

The businessman looked around the room and all the waiters, waitresses, busboys, etc., had spoons in their pockets. When the waiter returned to take the order, the businessman had to ask, "Why the spoons?"

"Well," he explained, "our parent company recently hired some efficiency experts to review all our procedures and, after months of statistical analyses, they concluded that our patrons drop spoons on the floor 73% more often than any other utensil at a frequency of 3 spoons per hour per workstation. By preparing all our workers for this contingency in advance, we can cut down our trips to the kitchen and save time...nearly 1.5 extra man hours per shift."

Just as he concluded, a "ch-ching" came from the table behind him and he quickly replaced the fallen spoon with the one from his pocket. "I'll grab another spoon the next time I'm in the kitchen instead of making a special trip," he proudly explained.

The businessman was impressed. "Thanks, I just had to ask."

"No problem," he answered, and then he continued to take everyone's order. The businessman spotted a thin, black thread protruding from the waiter's fly.

As he looked around the room and, sure enough, there were other waiters and busboys with strings hanging out of their trousers.

The businessman's curiosity overrode discretion at this point so, before he could leave, he had to ask.

"Excuse me, but...uh...why, or what...about that string?"

"Oh, yeah," he began in a quieter tone. "Not many people are that observant. That same efficiency group found we could save time in the men's room, too."

"How's that?"

"You see, by tying a string to the end of our, eh, SELVES, we can pull it out at the urinals, literally hands-free, and thereby eliminate the need to wash our hands, cutting the time spent in the restroom by over 93%!"

"Oh, that makes sense," said the businessman, thinking through the process. "Hey, wait a minute," he asked. "If the string helps you pull it out, how do you get it back in?"

"Well," he whispered, "I don't know about the other guys, but I use my spoon."

[C.J.]

Hmmm, The Spoons means this to me:



80's band - quite good!

[mailman]

[JJ Irani]

[astcell]

I like the t-shirt: "Spooning leads to Forking."

[Lt. Dan]

[padi56]