Snagged in the Act!

[padi56]

Supposed True Story.

As a Critical Care EMT and volunteer firefighter, I've always enjoyed the surprises that we often encounter on emergency calls. But even in my wildest dreams (believe me, they're wild!) did I expect to come across this situation:

We were called for an unknown subject with an unknown chief complaint. As we pulled up at the scene, we saw two cops lying on the front lawn laughing their ars#s off. So, I went up to one of the cops I knew and asked, "Andy, what's wrong?"

He just sat there laughing so hard that he couldn't talk, so he pointed in the general direction of the house. We walked in and found a guy sitting on a couch with his legs spread with a girl's head right in his crotch. It seemed like she was giving him a bl#w job. But she had braces and managed to snag the skin of his pen#s so tightly that they couldn't get it out.

We then had to transport this duo to the hospital by placing him supine on the stretcher with his partner curled up at his legs in the fetal position. To prevent further embarrassment, we covered them with a blanket , brought the ambulance to the front door of the house, and quickly hauled them in.

"OK, wise ars#, how are you going to call this in to the hospital?". asked a crew member with an evil grin.

I picked up the radio and started, "Mather Memorial, we are enroute with two patients; one male with an entangled object, and one female with a possible obstructed airway."

"What do you mean, possible obstructed airway?!!" ejaculated the E.R. nurse

"Never mind, just have a private room ready when we get there!"



The head nurse was already standing at the door when we arrived.

"So, what have you got?" she asked

"Private room," I whispered

"Naw, I gotta see what you got."

"Trust me, PRIVATE room"

(We had them so well covered with sheets and blankets that you couldn't see anything.)

"Come on, I gotta see!" replied the nurse impatiently

"OK, you win!"

The nurse lifted up the sheets and immediately yanked it down and yelled, "IN THERE!"

So we dropped them off, got our paperwork signed, rushed outside, and started laughing our ars#s off. Even on our way back, we giggled through each radio transmission until the dispatcher said, "When you guys get back, you're coming in here 'cause I wanna hear this story."

At the base, we rolled around on the floor of the dispatch room laughing so hard that there were tears streaming down our faces.

And people say EMS is boring.

[AJC]

[JJ Irani]

LMAO!! Nice one on a Sunday morning.